Well. Just...well.
So we suck and sucked all night and it was awful and ugly and dsipiriting and we quit and there were boos and a lot of other bad stuff, so there simply is no other substitute than pretty girls. For this season Dr. Bricklayer would actually suggest one of those sites that you pay for and they put some funny secret name on your credit card bill, but as that is not us (well not yet, the way this is going I am thinking of taking it up with the site owner), instead tonight we will get a carryover from the suggested theme last time out: Pretty Girls, Sci Fi Hotties Edition
As noted I'll pretty much dodge the Star Trek hotties, who already had their own thread last year, and the Star Wars princesses, tagged last time out, and a few others that have already passed on through.
(very low) grades will come...
Salmons ( C+ ) -- there were precious few middle ground players in this one -- a couple of guys gave us some game (Kevin, JT) and then pretty much everyone else... John was kind of it. Not good by any stretch, but less than awful, which made him look decent just by default. Had a couple of early hits of his own, but struggled to contain the much bigger Luol Deng the other way. Had a big dunk to open the second quarter, and was able to work Sefalosha much easier without having to worry about him much on the other end. Started to try to one man hero us back into it in the late 3rd, but had as many miscues as hits and it went the other way.
Barbarella (Jane Fonda) -- 60s sex kitten saves the universe by boinking it to death. What's not to like? Apparently there was supposed to be a remake made of this for whatever reason, by Robert Rodriguez's Rose McGowan fetish got in the way as he apparently can no longer imagine life without his snookums as the leading lady in every one of his films, but the studios weren't buying it.
Thompson ( B+ ) -- once again maybe the brightest part of a very dim game, and dim month, for us. But actually got off to a poor start, getting badly worked by Tyrus Thomas on defense in the first quarter. Could not stay with him at all. Recovered though to become a major part of our second quarter mini comeback with his energy on the glass. Continuing to show much improved touch around the basket, and also continues to be one of the few Kings who keeps playing hard even when we are getting blown out again. That actually cuts both ways, as it is certainly a good trait and much better than watching most of the guys just quit nightly (those who were even trying to start), but also means that Jason frequently ends up padding his stats after the game is largely over.
Leelu (Milla Jovovich) -- I had to choose here whether to go for Leelu from The Fifth Element or Milla's character from the Resident Evil series. But this one was the first time I had really seen Milla, and despite being in a ridiculous movie playing a ridiculous character with her hair dyed bright orange, she left quite an impression. I think the spacy alien nature of the character helped to cover for the wince-worthy acting skills, as if anybody cared whether she could act. But she also managed to project a very sweet vulnerability through all the stylized noise.
Miller ( C- ) -- early on this was a mixed bag, before descending to worse. The Bulls had Tyrus Thomas on him on him, and Brad appropiately used his size/bulk advantage a couple of times, taking his time inside, but otherwise was pestered by the smaller quicker plauyer. The real problem was, as it so often is, on the other side of the court. When he guarded Thomas, Thomas blew by him. When he guarded Noah it turned into a demoralizing dunkfest as Rose found his center again and again moving without the ball, for alley oops, on the break, and Brad was posing for a few more posters. Flat and passionless once again.
Tricia Helfer -- this is a cylon
Martin ( B ) -- was the only King really going in the early going, and dominated the first half matchup against Ben Gordon, getting him into foul trouble and scoring on him repeatedly. Was literally all that stood between our heartless effort and us going down 30 by half to a 19-27 team on our home court. Ran out of steam and help in the third and began to get clearly frustrated and force ugly shots and turnovers. Meanwhile Gordon crawled back into the game and began his own stat padding campaign. What was troubling about this game was not the game itself -- Kevin was clearly one of two guys (Jason was the other) who's game you could feel some sort of decent about afterwards. But the body language was terrible and he basically gave up on us in the second half. Roughly translated it said "Screw this. I am disgusted. You disgust me. I am outta here." A decent reflection of the fans' feelings through all this, but there is no solution there for the team. No leadership.
Grace Park -- so is this. Why are we resisting them again?
So we suck and sucked all night and it was awful and ugly and dsipiriting and we quit and there were boos and a lot of other bad stuff, so there simply is no other substitute than pretty girls. For this season Dr. Bricklayer would actually suggest one of those sites that you pay for and they put some funny secret name on your credit card bill, but as that is not us (well not yet, the way this is going I am thinking of taking it up with the site owner), instead tonight we will get a carryover from the suggested theme last time out: Pretty Girls, Sci Fi Hotties Edition
As noted I'll pretty much dodge the Star Trek hotties, who already had their own thread last year, and the Star Wars princesses, tagged last time out, and a few others that have already passed on through.
(very low) grades will come...
Salmons ( C+ ) -- there were precious few middle ground players in this one -- a couple of guys gave us some game (Kevin, JT) and then pretty much everyone else... John was kind of it. Not good by any stretch, but less than awful, which made him look decent just by default. Had a couple of early hits of his own, but struggled to contain the much bigger Luol Deng the other way. Had a big dunk to open the second quarter, and was able to work Sefalosha much easier without having to worry about him much on the other end. Started to try to one man hero us back into it in the late 3rd, but had as many miscues as hits and it went the other way.
Barbarella (Jane Fonda) -- 60s sex kitten saves the universe by boinking it to death. What's not to like? Apparently there was supposed to be a remake made of this for whatever reason, by Robert Rodriguez's Rose McGowan fetish got in the way as he apparently can no longer imagine life without his snookums as the leading lady in every one of his films, but the studios weren't buying it.
Thompson ( B+ ) -- once again maybe the brightest part of a very dim game, and dim month, for us. But actually got off to a poor start, getting badly worked by Tyrus Thomas on defense in the first quarter. Could not stay with him at all. Recovered though to become a major part of our second quarter mini comeback with his energy on the glass. Continuing to show much improved touch around the basket, and also continues to be one of the few Kings who keeps playing hard even when we are getting blown out again. That actually cuts both ways, as it is certainly a good trait and much better than watching most of the guys just quit nightly (those who were even trying to start), but also means that Jason frequently ends up padding his stats after the game is largely over.
Leelu (Milla Jovovich) -- I had to choose here whether to go for Leelu from The Fifth Element or Milla's character from the Resident Evil series. But this one was the first time I had really seen Milla, and despite being in a ridiculous movie playing a ridiculous character with her hair dyed bright orange, she left quite an impression. I think the spacy alien nature of the character helped to cover for the wince-worthy acting skills, as if anybody cared whether she could act. But she also managed to project a very sweet vulnerability through all the stylized noise.
Miller ( C- ) -- early on this was a mixed bag, before descending to worse. The Bulls had Tyrus Thomas on him on him, and Brad appropiately used his size/bulk advantage a couple of times, taking his time inside, but otherwise was pestered by the smaller quicker plauyer. The real problem was, as it so often is, on the other side of the court. When he guarded Thomas, Thomas blew by him. When he guarded Noah it turned into a demoralizing dunkfest as Rose found his center again and again moving without the ball, for alley oops, on the break, and Brad was posing for a few more posters. Flat and passionless once again.
Tricia Helfer -- this is a cylon
Martin ( B ) -- was the only King really going in the early going, and dominated the first half matchup against Ben Gordon, getting him into foul trouble and scoring on him repeatedly. Was literally all that stood between our heartless effort and us going down 30 by half to a 19-27 team on our home court. Ran out of steam and help in the third and began to get clearly frustrated and force ugly shots and turnovers. Meanwhile Gordon crawled back into the game and began his own stat padding campaign. What was troubling about this game was not the game itself -- Kevin was clearly one of two guys (Jason was the other) who's game you could feel some sort of decent about afterwards. But the body language was terrible and he basically gave up on us in the second half. Roughly translated it said "Screw this. I am disgusted. You disgust me. I am outta here." A decent reflection of the fans' feelings through all this, but there is no solution there for the team. No leadership.
Grace Park -- so is this. Why are we resisting them again?
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