WILLIE CAULEY-STEIN NAMED NBA "FIRST HALF PLAYER OF THE WEEK"
- NBA League Office
To be distributed to all media outlets
Commissioner Adam Silver announced this morning that rather than waiting until Monday, the NBA is declaring Willie Cauley-Stein their "NBA First Half Player Of The Week".
Silver exclaimed, "We usually wait until the results of the Sunday Games, but since Easter falls on April 1 this year and many players are likely to be hungover after a long night of egg-noggiing and muggle-rolling, we have just decided to give Willie the award now - after all, no one could top his recent performances.
Cauley-Stein, who scored 15 of his 17 points in the first half on Thursday against the Indiana Pacers and followed that up with all 12 of his points in the first half of Saturday's loss to the Warriors, could not be quoted here, as he has officially disappeared.
Previously, a comment attributed to Cauley-Stein announced that "I love me my halftime muggle"