Tetsujin
The Game Thread Dude
Hey all. Since it seems Piksi is still refusing to grace us with his presences (How dare he? Hum.) I guess I'll have to do some of these one again (Don't expect me doing too many significant game thread posts anymore though because my schedule has tightened up considerably and I would actually rather spend my free time watching the games rather than writing about them- Hey, I never claimed to be a sports journalist.).
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Well two games into the season we are either the greatest Kings team to grace the court at Broke Fraud Braclet Pavilion since THE team or the worst team to lace them up since the instatement of the 24-second shot clock depending on which game you watched and who you asked about the games.
So which version of the 2011-2012 Sacramento Kings do I think is closer to reality? I think I'd have to lean more towards the first one. Now before you pull out the pitchforks and hand grenades and run me out of town, let me justify myself.
We are a young team full of young, inexperienced talent. Part of being inexperienced is laying the occassional big fat egg such as what we saw in the Rose Garden last night. Ultimately though, there probably aren't going to be too many nights where Marcus Thornton, Tyreke Evans, and Paul Westphal all decide to suck simultaneously.
Considering the fact that our big men were apparently the only players on the team who bothered going to Portland, Westphal's stupid, stupid infatuation with ridiculous smallball lime-ups was infuriating to say the least. Gerald Wallace was able to beat us up by going at the smaller dude defending him, putting an even smaller person on him probably isn't going to work any better.
Lost in all the chaos of the Portland Massacre was the fact that Demarcus Cousins, or My Favorite Monster (nickname trademark pending), continued upon his path of dominance, making people look simply silly on BOTH sides of the court several times in the game. Keep it up big fella.
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related to
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Tonight we play the Bulls, a team favored by some pundits to win the NBA championship. With Derrick Rose and Rip Hamilton (albeit this is the old sucky version of Rip Hamilton, who would appear to be doing his best to impersonate a naked mole rat with a goatee as seen above) and Ronnie Brewer in the backcourt, it's going to be important for our own backcourt to not completely blow when it comes to pretending to playing defense.
In the frontcourt, Carlos Boozer will continnue to be a better version of Carl Landry, but that's what we got the Chuckwagon for anyways. Demarcus will be matched up against Joakim Noah, who of course will also be taking on a bad hair day as is customary for him (For serious, someone get him a Head & Shoulders commercial already!). As Noah is a good defender, this gives Boogie a good opportunity to work on his moves (and no, I don't mean the Dougie). This is all assuming that he somehow manages to play more than half of the game tonight. Taj Gibson is a nice back up big man but we've got two of those in JJ Hickson and JT.
On the brightside, Loul Deng isn't Gerald Wallace so there's that.
I'd be remiss if I forgot to mention the fact that we've also got another sellout crowd in Arco to support our guys/ bring the thunder.
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AWARD TIME
TDM (Tony Delk Memorial Award): GW and Nick Batum sheerly for the fact that they are actually SFs
LW-VC (Luke Walton Vacuum Cleaner Award): No one. Maybe the entire Kings backcourt. Just because.
JHA (Jason Hart Award): Travis Outlaw. Somehow Donte Greene isn't looking all that bad at this point.
SAR (Shareef Abdur-Rahim Award): Isn't Kurt Thomas eligible for the Early Bird special at this point?
MM (Mikki Moore/Minnie Mouse Award): Reke
RA&1 (Rafer Alston And One Award): Isaiah Thomas for exceptional driving into the heart of the opponents defense every freaking time-ness
WTF Moment of the Game: Lack of tall SF in line-up results in GW killing us, which results in us putting in 5'9" Isaiah Thomas to counter the problem.
SPECIAL BONUS AWARD:
Bill Walton Award for Broadcasting Excellence: the entire Portland Trailblazers TV crew. Bravo lads, bravo.
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Match-Ups
Reke vs Rose - One of these men may be stupid but the other had to falsify his SATs to get into college.
MT vs Rip - I doubt that that mask is ever going to look cool.
Salmons vs Deng - Passing is overrated anyways
Hayes vs Boozer - Probably only time that Boozer is taller than who he's playing against.
Boogie vs Noah - Let's try to play more than 30 minutes this time, shall we?
Jimmer vs the 3-Pt Line - Did Peja cast a curse of the sharpshooter?
Westphal vs Isaiah Thomas - Can Westphal resist the allure of giving the super small dude a full thirty minutes of playing time?
Me vs Slow Japanese Internet- Will I be able to actually watch the game?
Sacramento vs Anaheim - This stays up until we've built the new arena.
My final Prediction
Kings 97 Bulls 95
GO KINGS!
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Well two games into the season we are either the greatest Kings team to grace the court at Broke Fraud Braclet Pavilion since THE team or the worst team to lace them up since the instatement of the 24-second shot clock depending on which game you watched and who you asked about the games.
So which version of the 2011-2012 Sacramento Kings do I think is closer to reality? I think I'd have to lean more towards the first one. Now before you pull out the pitchforks and hand grenades and run me out of town, let me justify myself.
We are a young team full of young, inexperienced talent. Part of being inexperienced is laying the occassional big fat egg such as what we saw in the Rose Garden last night. Ultimately though, there probably aren't going to be too many nights where Marcus Thornton, Tyreke Evans, and Paul Westphal all decide to suck simultaneously.
Considering the fact that our big men were apparently the only players on the team who bothered going to Portland, Westphal's stupid, stupid infatuation with ridiculous smallball lime-ups was infuriating to say the least. Gerald Wallace was able to beat us up by going at the smaller dude defending him, putting an even smaller person on him probably isn't going to work any better.
Lost in all the chaos of the Portland Massacre was the fact that Demarcus Cousins, or My Favorite Monster (nickname trademark pending), continued upon his path of dominance, making people look simply silly on BOTH sides of the court several times in the game. Keep it up big fella.
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Tonight we play the Bulls, a team favored by some pundits to win the NBA championship. With Derrick Rose and Rip Hamilton (albeit this is the old sucky version of Rip Hamilton, who would appear to be doing his best to impersonate a naked mole rat with a goatee as seen above) and Ronnie Brewer in the backcourt, it's going to be important for our own backcourt to not completely blow when it comes to pretending to playing defense.
In the frontcourt, Carlos Boozer will continnue to be a better version of Carl Landry, but that's what we got the Chuckwagon for anyways. Demarcus will be matched up against Joakim Noah, who of course will also be taking on a bad hair day as is customary for him (For serious, someone get him a Head & Shoulders commercial already!). As Noah is a good defender, this gives Boogie a good opportunity to work on his moves (and no, I don't mean the Dougie). This is all assuming that he somehow manages to play more than half of the game tonight. Taj Gibson is a nice back up big man but we've got two of those in JJ Hickson and JT.
On the brightside, Loul Deng isn't Gerald Wallace so there's that.
I'd be remiss if I forgot to mention the fact that we've also got another sellout crowd in Arco to support our guys/ bring the thunder.
-----
AWARD TIME
TDM (Tony Delk Memorial Award): GW and Nick Batum sheerly for the fact that they are actually SFs
LW-VC (Luke Walton Vacuum Cleaner Award): No one. Maybe the entire Kings backcourt. Just because.
JHA (Jason Hart Award): Travis Outlaw. Somehow Donte Greene isn't looking all that bad at this point.
SAR (Shareef Abdur-Rahim Award): Isn't Kurt Thomas eligible for the Early Bird special at this point?
MM (Mikki Moore/Minnie Mouse Award): Reke
RA&1 (Rafer Alston And One Award): Isaiah Thomas for exceptional driving into the heart of the opponents defense every freaking time-ness
WTF Moment of the Game: Lack of tall SF in line-up results in GW killing us, which results in us putting in 5'9" Isaiah Thomas to counter the problem.
SPECIAL BONUS AWARD:
Bill Walton Award for Broadcasting Excellence: the entire Portland Trailblazers TV crew. Bravo lads, bravo.
-----
Match-Ups
Reke vs Rose - One of these men may be stupid but the other had to falsify his SATs to get into college.
MT vs Rip - I doubt that that mask is ever going to look cool.
Salmons vs Deng - Passing is overrated anyways
Hayes vs Boozer - Probably only time that Boozer is taller than who he's playing against.
Boogie vs Noah - Let's try to play more than 30 minutes this time, shall we?
Jimmer vs the 3-Pt Line - Did Peja cast a curse of the sharpshooter?
Westphal vs Isaiah Thomas - Can Westphal resist the allure of giving the super small dude a full thirty minutes of playing time?
Me vs Slow Japanese Internet- Will I be able to actually watch the game?
Sacramento vs Anaheim - This stays up until we've built the new arena.
My final Prediction
Kings 97 Bulls 95
GO KINGS!