Bricklayer
Don't Make Me Use The Bat
In honor of Ron's tooth incident, tonight's theme is going to be: Real Tough Guys . Ron wouldn't even make the B list compared to these guys.
Note: upon a suggestion I am going to include a "clean" theme-free version of the grades down beneath the themed grades (i.e. after even Theus's grade) under one of these:
. It was suggested to me, and I agree, that the themes break up the grades narrative somewhat, so once I am done with the theme I am going to copy/paste all of them under one spoiler tag (I hope -- unless there is some sort of restriction on how much info you can have under one of them).
Cisco ( B ) -- started off the game with a quick postup of Daniel Gibson -- good move by Theus to immediately try to use our no-PG lineup to our favor. But predictably got into foul trouble after his one post up. Had some good drives in the second quarter which succeeded on on pure aggression more than finesse or skill. And after starting the third with what I am sure was another drawn up attempted posting of Gibson (failed), played a very aggressive half, including making several last second bailout hoops when our offense had broken down. Now, the fact that our offense had broken down largely because Cisco was hogging the ball and just dribbling dribbling dribbling without moving it he'd probably prefer we don't talk about. Overall a strong/solid game in most ways, but if he was the "PG" the zero assists tells you most of what you need about his effectiveness in getting us into anything. Note: I have Cisco here listed at SF, and Salmons at PG. But this game it was pretty clear the matchups were Cisco vs. PGs and Salons vs. LeBron, so that should probably be reversed (and would be if I weren't so lazy).
Man Bites Dog To Death -- you don't mess with this guy. What do you do when you see a big dog trying to eat your puppy? Jump the damn thing and show it who's got the real canines of course:
http://www.wayodd.com/chinese-man-bites-dog/v/7597/
Moore ( D+ ) -- invisible man remake should star this man. Never has such outlandish hair been so let down by the actual product underneath. On his way to his nightly 3pts 4rebs nothingness had two highlights: first in the third quarter got free for a drive and dunk when Big Z mysteriously decided to get over aggressive with him. Second in the final minutes may have been a tad late on a rotation out to a three point shooter -- didn't look that bad to me, but Theus barked something nasty at him (happened right in front of our bench) and it appeared that mikki Moore of all people barked something back. This led to one of Reggie's now patented go to your room maneuvers where he yanks a guy, browbeats him, and then immediately reinserts him. Other than that, I noticed him set one good screen for Cisco I think and...liek I say, invisible man. No help at all while Z, Gooden and Devin Brown (of all people) pounded us on the glass.
Bert Trautmann -- who you may well ask? Bert Trautmann of course! Bert used to be a goalkeeper for Manchester back in the good ole days (the 1950s). Damn good one too. But what Bert is most famous for was his play in the 1956 FA Cup Finals (English soccer championship). You see in the middle of the game Bert got involved in a big collision and knocked unconcsious. Undaunted, he was revived and returned to the game to play goaltender, and make a bunch of great saves to secure the win. What wasn't revealed at the time was that he had suffered a broken neck in the collision and was playing with a broken vertebrae in his neck.
:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bert_Trautmann
Miller ( C+ ) -- missed everything early, and neither he nor Mikki were able to keep Big Z off the glass. Did pick up his own rebounding as the half went along, and played a nice two man game with Kevin near the end of the first half ala the old Peja days. Started his whiny thing again in the third, complaining after numerous non calls. We were in a zone much of the time disguising his interior weakness and confusing the primitive Cavs offense, but when we dropped out of it, Gooden and Z routinely outmuscled him (althought Z could not get anything to fall in there). But while he could not shoot, who knows maybe that helped him to think like a big man as he put up solid rebound numbers (the pause being that his opponents put up even bigger ones), and came up with a trio of surprise blocks inside. Also was even willing to put that awesome mobility on display in a number of show traps on LeBron way up above the circle. So...not much help on offense, but was (of course) our only big playing like a big, so maybe not so very bad. Decided on the lower half grade because he was another one of our mega-minutes guys, and the 10rebs aren't really that special in that much time.
66 Year Old Man Saws Off Own Leg -- so its time to move onto the nutty amputation section, and this one I really liked when it popped up this summer. Old guy has a tree fall on him in the forest. All by himself, no help will come, and he can;t move the tree. So he decided the only way out is to cut off his own leg...with a pocket knife!!:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2007/06/06/state/n132845D67.DTL
Martin ( A ) -- solid first quarter, hihglighted bya nice steal on Devin Brown up top leading to a breakaway. And was off to another big first half taking advantage of the gaping chest wound that is the Cavs OG spot with Hughes out and Pavlovic still playing himself into shape (actually
its pretty much a wound even when those guys are 100%, but Hughes is at least a rangy defender). Scoring pace slowed in the third, but his nighty FT fest continued at a torrid pace -- 18 more this time out -- and kept him lurching forward almost to the end of the game. That end deserves some discussion, because we were down 2 with 30 seconds to go or so, and on a night when Kevin already had 32 of course you are going to give the ball to him, which we did. Thing was, and you could see this coming given that he ahd already shot 18 FTs on the night, he basically went for the flop rather than the shot, pumped and jumped into the guy, did not get the call, and we lost it in the ensuing chaos. Can't leave the game in the refs hands --have to try to get a shot up and let the fouls take care of themselves. Anyway, it was still another big game for Kevin, keyed around the FT party, and the late failure alone can't knock it off of an A I think. Not as good as the other night, really didn;t shoot that great, and took an insane 46 minutes to put up the numbers (and really that's got to slow down a bit here or Kevin is going to be exhausted by the Christmas). But he outscored and generally outperformed LeBron in a nationally televised game (note that LeBron had insane defensive attention thrown at him), and was at the heart all game long of us keeping it close.
Man Cuts Off His Own Arm -- and of course this was the more famous story of the guy who cut off his own arm after it was pinned by an 800 pound boulder. With, you guessed it, a pocket knife. remind me to leave my pocket knife at home next time I am out in the wild lest I get the urge to do something really nutty with it:
http://www.sptimes.com/2003/05/03/Worldandnation/To_save_his_life__hik.shtml
Note: upon a suggestion I am going to include a "clean" theme-free version of the grades down beneath the themed grades (i.e. after even Theus's grade) under one of these:
Clean Grades Below
Cisco ( B ) -- started off the game with a quick postup of Daniel Gibson -- good move by Theus to immediately try to use our no-PG lineup to our favor. But predictably got into foul trouble after his one post up. Had some good drives in the second quarter which succeeded on on pure aggression more than finesse or skill. And after starting the third with what I am sure was another drawn up attempted posting of Gibson (failed), played a very aggressive half, including making several last second bailout hoops when our offense had broken down. Now, the fact that our offense had broken down largely because Cisco was hogging the ball and just dribbling dribbling dribbling without moving it he'd probably prefer we don't talk about. Overall a strong/solid game in most ways, but if he was the "PG" the zero assists tells you most of what you need about his effectiveness in getting us into anything. Note: I have Cisco here listed at SF, and Salmons at PG. But this game it was pretty clear the matchups were Cisco vs. PGs and Salons vs. LeBron, so that should probably be reversed (and would be if I weren't so lazy).
Man Bites Dog To Death -- you don't mess with this guy. What do you do when you see a big dog trying to eat your puppy? Jump the damn thing and show it who's got the real canines of course:
http://www.wayodd.com/chinese-man-bites-dog/v/7597/
Moore ( D+ ) -- invisible man remake should star this man. Never has such outlandish hair been so let down by the actual product underneath. On his way to his nightly 3pts 4rebs nothingness had two highlights: first in the third quarter got free for a drive and dunk when Big Z mysteriously decided to get over aggressive with him. Second in the final minutes may have been a tad late on a rotation out to a three point shooter -- didn't look that bad to me, but Theus barked something nasty at him (happened right in front of our bench) and it appeared that mikki Moore of all people barked something back. This led to one of Reggie's now patented go to your room maneuvers where he yanks a guy, browbeats him, and then immediately reinserts him. Other than that, I noticed him set one good screen for Cisco I think and...liek I say, invisible man. No help at all while Z, Gooden and Devin Brown (of all people) pounded us on the glass.
Bert Trautmann -- who you may well ask? Bert Trautmann of course! Bert used to be a goalkeeper for Manchester back in the good ole days (the 1950s). Damn good one too. But what Bert is most famous for was his play in the 1956 FA Cup Finals (English soccer championship). You see in the middle of the game Bert got involved in a big collision and knocked unconcsious. Undaunted, he was revived and returned to the game to play goaltender, and make a bunch of great saves to secure the win. What wasn't revealed at the time was that he had suffered a broken neck in the collision and was playing with a broken vertebrae in his neck.
:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bert_Trautmann
Miller ( C+ ) -- missed everything early, and neither he nor Mikki were able to keep Big Z off the glass. Did pick up his own rebounding as the half went along, and played a nice two man game with Kevin near the end of the first half ala the old Peja days. Started his whiny thing again in the third, complaining after numerous non calls. We were in a zone much of the time disguising his interior weakness and confusing the primitive Cavs offense, but when we dropped out of it, Gooden and Z routinely outmuscled him (althought Z could not get anything to fall in there). But while he could not shoot, who knows maybe that helped him to think like a big man as he put up solid rebound numbers (the pause being that his opponents put up even bigger ones), and came up with a trio of surprise blocks inside. Also was even willing to put that awesome mobility on display in a number of show traps on LeBron way up above the circle. So...not much help on offense, but was (of course) our only big playing like a big, so maybe not so very bad. Decided on the lower half grade because he was another one of our mega-minutes guys, and the 10rebs aren't really that special in that much time.
66 Year Old Man Saws Off Own Leg -- so its time to move onto the nutty amputation section, and this one I really liked when it popped up this summer. Old guy has a tree fall on him in the forest. All by himself, no help will come, and he can;t move the tree. So he decided the only way out is to cut off his own leg...with a pocket knife!!:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2007/06/06/state/n132845D67.DTL
Martin ( A ) -- solid first quarter, hihglighted bya nice steal on Devin Brown up top leading to a breakaway. And was off to another big first half taking advantage of the gaping chest wound that is the Cavs OG spot with Hughes out and Pavlovic still playing himself into shape (actually
its pretty much a wound even when those guys are 100%, but Hughes is at least a rangy defender). Scoring pace slowed in the third, but his nighty FT fest continued at a torrid pace -- 18 more this time out -- and kept him lurching forward almost to the end of the game. That end deserves some discussion, because we were down 2 with 30 seconds to go or so, and on a night when Kevin already had 32 of course you are going to give the ball to him, which we did. Thing was, and you could see this coming given that he ahd already shot 18 FTs on the night, he basically went for the flop rather than the shot, pumped and jumped into the guy, did not get the call, and we lost it in the ensuing chaos. Can't leave the game in the refs hands --have to try to get a shot up and let the fouls take care of themselves. Anyway, it was still another big game for Kevin, keyed around the FT party, and the late failure alone can't knock it off of an A I think. Not as good as the other night, really didn;t shoot that great, and took an insane 46 minutes to put up the numbers (and really that's got to slow down a bit here or Kevin is going to be exhausted by the Christmas). But he outscored and generally outperformed LeBron in a nationally televised game (note that LeBron had insane defensive attention thrown at him), and was at the heart all game long of us keeping it close.
Man Cuts Off His Own Arm -- and of course this was the more famous story of the guy who cut off his own arm after it was pinned by an 800 pound boulder. With, you guessed it, a pocket knife. remind me to leave my pocket knife at home next time I am out in the wild lest I get the urge to do something really nutty with it:
http://www.sptimes.com/2003/05/03/Worldandnation/To_save_his_life__hik.shtml
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Hope you're better quick, 3G.
