1) Lakers always had Kobe. They were MILES ahead of us for a #8 seed because they had the most difficult piece to acquire (the superstar) already in the fold, and were only a few lesser moves from being ready to jump back into the fray (the Gasol trade still being a ridiculous gift). Before we can do anything (in a serious manner) we still have to go out and acquire our own superstar, and that is just rough. If we offered our entire team for Kobe, the Lakers would say no. Ditto Cleveland, Orlando, New Orleans etc. That's how rare and valuable those guys are. Worth more than our entire 1-12.
2) Consciously or unconcsciously you are badly mangling/manipulating start dates on your non-rebuilding examples. Phoenix was a terrible team the year before Nash arrived. Being a terrible team had netted them Amare as well. They absolutely rebuilt with youth, Nash was jsut that final free agent acquisition to bring it all together. "The Heat added Shaq". Yes they did. To a team just coming out of a rebuilding phase which had netted them their own superstar in Wade (as well as given them Caron Butler to trade for Shaq). Celtics added garnett and Allen...to a 15 win godawful team, using the #5 pick they earned for their awfulness, as well as an entire stack of young, and therefore valuable, kids they had stacked up int he previous 4 years of drafting. Whether you knew it or not you ran through a whoile listing of teams that all had embraced the rbuilding mantra -- they had all gotten bad, all drafted or hoped to draft young kids who would be major stars, and all are back now. you can thrown New Orleans inot that mix )that's how they got Paul); Utah (that's how they got Deron), Denver (how they got Carmelo), Dallas (once upon a time how they got Dirk), Orlando (how they got Dwight), Cleveland (how they got LeBron) and so on and so on. Each and every one of those teams accepted the necessity of the rebuild, of having an awful year or two, and they ALL had them themself 20-something (or worse) win seasons as they stockpiled the young studs who would lead them through the next decade.
By refusing and refusing and refusing to do so ourselves we are like somebody with a broken leg who refuses to get it set because he is afraid of the pain. All he is doing is prolonging the agony before the necessary procedure is performed anyway, unless he really wants to push it to the extreme, go through months of agony, and end hobbling about on a permanently disabled leg that will never be able to compete with all the guys who juat got theirs fixed.
I don't think that the kings are refusing to rebuild, as you put it. Instead, I think it is more that Petrie realizes that teams are almost never built entirely through a series of high lottery picks. It's a holistic process that involves everything from trades, free agent acquisitions, draft picks, and coaching.
In fact, one need not look any further than the conference finals this year to see that great teams can be built without high draft picks. The Pistons, for instance, only have one player in their starting lineup that was acquired through the draft, Tayshaun Prince (who I believe was a mid first rounder).
Billups, Hamilton, Wallace, and McDeyess were all acquired through trades or free agency. And the one up and coming player on their roster, Rodney Stuckey, was the 15th pick in last years draft.
The Lakers, which you mention heavily in your post, are a team built around Kobe Bryant, who was the 13th pick, and Andrew Bynum, who was the 10th pick. They pulled off a great trade to acquire Pau Gasol and are now poised to compete for championships for at least the next 3-4 years. Likewise, the Celtics were built around Paul Pierce, who was the 10th pick in the draft, and trades for Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen.
The Kings own success in the early part of the decade was not the result of a high draft pick turning into a franchise player, but instead was the product of a number of smart trades and free agent signings.
There are, of course, teams like the Spurs, Cavs, and Hornets who have used high draft picks to rebuild their franchises. But at the same time there are teams like the Grizzlies and Clippers who each had long stretches with very high lottery picks, yet each failed to obtain a single "franchise" player to rebuild around.
I think at this point the Kings don't really need to try and lose more games in an attempt to get a high lottery pick. We already have an all-star caliber 2 guard in Kevin Martin (though he is unlikely to be a "franchise" caliber player), and I think Spencer can have even a better career than Brad Miller's. I honestly think that adding a great free agent in 2010 or making a good trade now would give us a playoff caliber roster. I don't think it has to be a long drawn out process either.