Grades v. Sixers 12/14

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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
#1
Three quarters of two bad teams fighting over who could give the other the win, and one quarter of one good team getting hot and dissecting a bad one = win for the team that played the good quarter. And we are off the schneid.

It has come to my attention that my first attempted apology (Jane Austen) to men in general for my thread featuring pictures of Greg Ostertag posing sexy may not have had its desired effect. Despite clearly functioning as a road map to not only understanding women, but to being able to fake a decent knowledge of one of the great staples of female readership and hence convince MOS's of your sensitivity, there appears to have been some resistance to said thread by the hardest core of hardcore neandrathals. Well, guess you can lead a horse to water....

In any case, therefore, as partial apology for my first attempted apology for posting sexy pictures of Greg Ostertag for the ladies, I hereby offer up: Great Movie Badasses

(and upon further review of my list, and in view of the back to back, I think I may milk this one for two topics -- tongiht Great Movie Badasses (career), and tommorow Great Movie Badasses (single movie). At which point I shall have tilted the playing field back the other way and will be promptly obligated to do a thread on Chick Flicks or Bath Oil.

Artest ( C ) -- Might be the easiest grade of the first three, simply because Ron was one fo the few Kings tongiht who did not deserve two grades -- one for his play in quarters 1,2 and 4, and one for his play in the third. For Ron it was just a game of near irrelevance. Certainly on offense he did not matter at all. He was guarded well, but mostly he was just not needed with Brad hyped up and playing out of control. And so he rarely touched it, and rarely did anything with it when he did. Now on the other end, not so much. This was Ron Artest vs. Andre Igoudala (mostly), and not terribly surprisingly, the defense won on both sides. Ron did not completely dominate Iggy, but you don't have to -- Iggy is not a great offensive player. He did however bother him, and that's all it took to hold him to a mediocre 15pt night. Ron was surprisingly taken to task by Iggy in the first quarter, but did hit the buzzer beating three at the end fo the first to draw us back into it -- really his only offensive highlight. But thereafter he locked into Iggy and shut him down, and occcasionally harassed Demi Moore's boy toy as well. Gave a little help on the glass, but overall really was not terribly important this time out. Not terrible, but just a roleplayer.

Matt Damon -- Matt almost did not make this list, because he's really only played the one badass character, whereas most of these other guys are careerists. But Jason Bourne is a true badass, and there have been three movies now, so I decided it qualified. Bourne is pretty much a badass at everything he does, but of course its his abilitry to kick the crud out of guys in close that is the most fun (using an ancient Filipino martial artst style called Kali). In fact Bourne is such a badass that even though he's lost his memory and doesn't really know who he is, or often who you are, he'll go ahead and kick your *** anyway just on the off chance you deserve it. Now that's a badass.


Moore ( A )
-- This was maybe right here, the ultimate Mikki Moore game. Set up again and again by teammates for point blank dunks, follows, alley oops, stupid screams every time he manages to walk and chew gum at the same time, you know the drill by now, but this was Mikki Moore purified. Had a huge third quarter just running to the rim and recieving pass after pass, getting offensive rebound after offensive rebound (well, three at least). Did not rebound otherwise (5 on the night), only created one shot for himself the whole night (dropped one nice hook on Dalembert), but played kind of the ultimate roleplaying game for us. What he did requires not much talent besides knowing where to be on the court, but just by doing that he had a major impact on the game with 24pts on 10-11 shooting (and 9 of the 10 may have been dunks). Its why despite his limited skills, Mikki continues to have a role in this league whereas guys like Kenny Thomas or Reef cannot smoothly integrate into a system where they are not featured. Mikki did not make the game happen -- Brad did. But he was there again and again all night long whenever Brad or Beno or Cisco or whoever created something -- Mikki was the finisher, and the Sixers frontline looked helpless to stop it. I wanted to separate this grade from Brad's, but will do so only through these notes -- this is Mikki Moore here, and you may never see this sort of game from him again. Giving him less than an A for it would be kind of silly, even if he was not the best King on the floor tonight.

Clint Eastwood -- one of the all time great badasses. Seriously -- how many people has this guy shot on celluoid? Spaghetti Westerns, Dirty Harry, Josie Wales, Pale Rider, through Unforgiven...you see that squint, you'd best duck. Maybe my favorite singular moment was in Unforgiven, when after spending the whole dark introspective movie trying to reform himself and be a God fearing man, the bad guys finally ticked him off to the point where he just said screw it, got drunk, walked into the local saloon, and gunned down everything that moved before sitting down to have a drink. Then hops on his horse and rides off in the rain bellowing out to the whole town (the ones he hasn't already shot) that he'd kill anybody else who got in his way or disrespected his friend's corpse. Now that's a badass.

Miller ( A ) -- you know, in the early going this did not look like much. The lane was completely open with Brad back there in the first, and if you had asked me at the end of the half how he had played I would have shrugged. Hit some open jumpers, you know the rest. And yet you looked at the numbers and he was 5-6 from the field for 12pts 5rebs. Were the numbers deceptive? Or the perception defective? I do not know. But in either case he completely carved up the Sixers in amonster third quarter and completely resolved any gap between statistics and performance. This game was freakish -- we won our first road game, but you read it here first -- you will never see this frontcourt pairing domainatre a game like this again. Brad went for 25pts 10rebs 6ast on 9-12 shooting. Mikki 24pts 5rebs 1ast on 10-11 shooting. That was 49 points on 19-23 shooting combined, for one of the weakest frontcourts in the league (both in fact, and statistically). It was amazing. And Brad was the real engine. He seemed to hit every shot he took, and while he made a couple of bad passes, he just carved the Sixers up in the third with his passing. Dalembert can't play that style, Evans sucked, and their kid, Jason Smith, looked clueless. Throw int he fact that Mo Cheeks cannot coach and has not gotten the memo that Brad is best guarded by a SF, and there was no hope for the Sixers. You would call this a throwback game for Brad, except there has been no time in his career when 25pt 10reb 6ast games on 9-12 shooting were at all common. Just a great game by him, and finally delivered to us a road win.

Arnold Schwartzenegger -- I mean, just look at that picture (even if all the roids have made, er, certain parts of his physique not at all badass). Cartoonish? Sure. But still one of the most famous movie badasses of all time. Starting with Conan the Barbarian and Terminator, and running through movie after movie for 15 years (aside from that one unfortunate Arnie gets pregnant movie which I really should have used in my Movies They Regret Theme), he kicked ***, took names, dropped silly quips, and rarely had time for any of those silly girl thingies. He was every 11 yr old's dream badass. Might have peaked his badassness in the early film Commando, when he was such a badass that not only did he singlehandedly take out hundreds of automatic weapon toting guards while using bullet proof rosebushes for cover, but he gets shot in the shoulder, barely winces, rams a pole through his opponent's gut, and a few minutes later hoists his 10yr old daughter up onto the same shoulder and carries her out with a smile on his face. Now that's badass.

Salmons ( B ) -- had a good but not great first half -- missed a lot of shots, but was aggressive and only sporadically impeded. Finsihed with 11 points, and was a solid presence. But ironically played his weakest while we played our best. Let Willie Green get a little out of his control in the third, and at a time when everybody else was swinging the ball, insisted on a nmumber of selfish one on one drives, many of which ended up as turnovers. Came back to redeem himself a bit late, as as we were struggling he hit a three and made a layup to help us hold the lead against the sputtering Sixers.

Bruce Lee -- this is almost an "any questions?"? badass here. I mean, how many thousands of people does one man have tro beat down with nothing but his fists and some cheesy sound effects before he gets labeled a badass? I mean, admittedly they all stupidly came at him one on one. And admittedly somebody at some point should really have just broken out a gun and ended the silliness, but really...this badass beat up Kareem Adbul-Jabbar! Ok, maybe that one was not so impressive, but how about this: Bruce Lee is the only being in existence to ever confront fellow badass Chuck Norris, and live to tell about it. Now that's badass.
 
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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
#2
Beno ( C ) -- this was one scraggly, ugly game for Beno. He actually got pulled early in the first qaurter, and he was going bad enough that it could have been for multiple reasons -- maybe his nonexistent defense, his repeated turnovers, his forced shots. You had choices. Came back in, but just got creamed by Andre Miller all first quarter, and for that matter, all first half: at halftime had been outscored by Miller 18-0. Yikes. But like much of our team, deserved an entirely separate grade for the third quarter when he came out and woke up with 11pts in the quarter, and his arrival was maybe the signal that we were going to take off and finally win a road game. Promptly returned to his shaky play in the 4th, and was one of the main culprits as we did everything possible to give back the game we had won in the third (Philly was having none of it though -- gotta love bad teams playing each other). I'm really giving him a C here for one quarter of work resulting in satisfactory overall numbers, but this wasn't a good game for Beno.

Mel Gibson -- ok, Mel Gibson may not jump right to mind when you think of badass, but think about it: Mad Max, Lethal Weapon, Braveheart, and most of all -- he's a real life nut to boot! Maybe his baddest *** moment though may have come in defeat: having the presence of mind to scream out "Freedom!" while somebody has just taken a large knife to your privates is pretty damn badass.

Cisco ( B) -- despite being the guy called upon to spell Beno in the first quarter, really gave us little or nothing in relief in the first. But came out and delivered a strong second quarter stint passing, as well as scoring himself. Was the beginning of the superior ball moevement that would peak for us in the third. Despite the strong quarter lost nearly all of his second half minutes I think mostly due to the great rhtyhtm the starters were in, but also potentially because of Reggie's knowledge of his unstable nature. In other words, we desperately needed to hold on, and Reggie may have decided Cisco was not worth the risk.

Chuck Norris -- a man so badass that there are entire websites dedicated to his badassness (check out
http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ ). How could he not make this list? Just remember: "Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People." Funny thing is, I barely remember any of his movies, and his long running TV series may never have been watched outside of Texas. He will, however, don spandex tights to sell you a very nice pulley based workout machine on late night infomercials though, so I guess that's, um, kind of badass.


Thomas ( INC ) -- oh, wonderful first half. Truly. Managed to block his own shot with the backboard, which in itself is outstanding and mght have deserved an A here if I had chosen to grade him. Came back briefly in the second half, and did not kill us.

John Wayne -- this was kind of your grandma's badass, but he was the ultimate Hollywood badass for a long time. He was very rarely not armed, but like a true badass, he didn't rely on those wussy weapons unless he had too -- he was a big man, and if he had a problem with you, he'd just ball up his fist and knock you on your ***. Now that's a badass.

Hawes ( C+ ) -- pretty good start to his second quarter stint. Beneficiary of our passing that quarter, and made a good hustle play in the corner to save a ball going out of bounds. But began to have trouble finishing inside, and continues to not understand shot selection, resulting ina number of missed jumeprs as well. Unexpectedly got the call to take our final shot of the half, and tried to go one on one against Dalembert...er...not yet rook.

Jean Claude Van Damme -- you know, this was a hard one. The funny thing is that Jean claude is one of the more capable badasses out there -- he was a European Karate Champion before he became an "actor", and in theory could kick the living bejesus out of you. But he's just...such a damn pretty boy. He might kick your ***, but then again, maybe you would muss his hair or smudge his lipstick and he'd have to go spend half an hour in the powder room before resuming kicking your ***. In any case, got in in the end for his ability to drop into an impossibly painful split from a standing position. On any normal man, such a maneauver would instantly and permanently emasulate him. But not on this badass -- he can pop right out of it and flex his butt cheeks at you with a wink.
 
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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
#3
Douby ( INC ) -- short minutes and limited impact on a day when Beno did not have it. Also may have discovered a new competitor for some of his minutes in Dahntay Jones.

Sylvester Stallone -- after creating not one, but two of the most famous movie badasses of all time, there was just no way to leave this guy off the list. Not only the ultimate killing machine in John Rambo, but also the ultimate I'll-break-your-fist-with-my-face fighter, Judge Dredd, a champion arm wrestler, an incredibly badass character named "Cobra" (who may make an appearance in tommorow night's theme), and the only man in history to ever make Sharon Stone's body look bad when they did a nude shower scene together in The Specialist. Not very gallant, but badass.

Jones ( INC ) -- I almost decided to go ahead and give him a grade, even though he, like Douby and KT, was hovering right around my grading cutoff point (6:00). One problem was that while he was not perfect, not spectacular, he, being Dante Jones, did everything I would have asked him too. He ran the break, made a nice drop off pass. Made a good defensive play (well...maybe not so much, but another night of incopmetent refs gave him the call anyway). Also turned it over, but nonetheless if I did give him a grade, it was going to be one of those interesting "do I give him an A for such short minutes, but playing well for Dante Jones? or "do I give him a B for such short minutes even though he may not play much better given such short minutes again because he is Dante Jones" decisions. So I just took the cowardly way out and gave him an INC instead. More than a little surprised he is getting any minutes really, as I thought him pinned behind Artest/Salmons/Cisco/Douby. But I think stole minutes from both of the latter two this time out.

Jet Li -- you know, I have never been overwhelmingly impressed by Jet Li, but he is still undoubtedly one of the modern masters of badass, and has the additional advantage of having debuted over in the States in a movie in which he repeatedly kicked the crap out of fellow badass Mel Gibson (admittedly over the hill in Lethal Weapon 4), and of having now twice starred across from other fellow badass Jason Stratham.

Reggie ( ) -- We won! Holy crap -- we won a road game! As mentioned in the intro, what it basically came down to was we played one good quarter, while they played none. The first half was a long and tedious game of hot potato, wiht each team frantically trying to give the game back to the other before they accidentally picked up a woss. There was a funny thing that popped up on the Bee's website at halftime -- a blog from Sam Amick, who was in the building. This was at the bottom of it:
UPDATE: I've heard of snoozer games, but are you kidding me? Someone is asleep on press row. I repeat (and I'm not exaggerating in the slightest), a member of the media is completely asleep. Arms crossed, head back, mouth so wide open Kyle Korver could probably bury a three in his throat from the floor! Priceless.
Amick's Full Blog:http://www.sacbee.com/static/weblogs/sports/kings/archives/009630.html

But then the third quarter came about, and things changed, if only briefly. For about 8-10 minutes there, it was like the San Antonio game again, we were playing way over our head, and Brad and Mikki in particular simultaneously exploded for their best quarters, and games, of the season. And maybe if we are playign a good team, they withstand that run and find a way to hang in it. But we were playing the Sixers, and that should have been fatal. Indeed in the end was fatal, but not because we didn't endeavor mightily to let them back into it in the 4th. Reggie was a little impatient throughout this one, and was willing to get into it with Beno in particular for some sloppy play. But in the second half in particular you could see Reggie really pushing hard here for the win. Had no time to mess with secondary considerations like rotation patterns or getting guys minutes, or saving anything for tonight. He let it go for about 3 minutes in the early 4th, and then it was right back to the starting unit which had dominated the third to try to close it out. May have even been an interesting decision on his part to move Dahntay Jones up over Cisco in the rotation as we tried to close it -- Cisco certainly got the bulk of the minutes tonight, but down the stretch when Reggie had gotten almost silly in his subbing in and out of Artest because of foul trouble (think he yanked him in and out about 3-4 times in 2-3 minutes there), it was Dahntay he turned to for those minutes as a steady don't-screw-it-up roleplayer, rather than the unpredictable Cisco. In any case, we broke the bagel. Last team in the NBA to do so, and blew our opportunity to set a franchise record for road futility to start a season. Oh well. With the caliber of opponents coming up, not out of the question for there to be another one or two on this trip either.

Jason Statham -- you know, its hard to add Euopeans to this type of list as there is so often an air of either the sophisticate or the effemiinate to Euro action stars which just does not reek badass. But now this guy is something else. Lantern jaw? Check. Tough guy stubble? Check. Kick your *** martial arts skills? Check. Mumbles unintelligibly? Check. Can deflect oncoming missles with a lunch platter? Check. I mean, what more do you want in a badass?
 
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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
#4
Clean Grades:
Artest ( C ) -- Might be the easiest grade of the first three, simply because Ron was one fo the few Kings tongiht who did not deserve two grades -- one for his play in quarters 1,2 and 4, and one for his play in the third. For Ron it was just a game of near irrelevance. Certainly on offense he did not matter at all. He was guarded well, but mostly he was just not needed with Brad hyped up and playing out of control. And so he rarely touched it, and rarely did anything with it when he did. Now on the other end, not so much. This was Ron Artest vs. Andre Igoudala (mostly), and not terribly surprisingly, the defense won on both sides. Ron did not completely dominate Iggy, but you don't have to -- Iggy is not a great offensive player. He did however bother him, and that's all it took to hold him to a mediocre 15pt night. Ron was surprisingly taken to task by Iggy in the first quarter, but did hit the buzzer beating three at the end fo the first to draw us back into it -- really his only offensive highlight. But thereafter he locked into Iggy and shut him down, and occcasionally harassed Demi Moore's boy toy as well. Gave a little help on the glass, but overall really was not terribly important this time out. Not terrible, but just a roleplayer.

Moore ( A ) -- This was maybe right here, the ultimate Mikki Moore game. Set up again and again by teammates for point blank dunks, follows, alley oops, stupid screams every time he manages to walk and chew gum at the same time, you know the drill by now, but this was Mikki Moore purified. Had a huge third quarter just running to the rim and recieving pass after pass, getting offensive rebound after offensive rebound (well, three at least). Did not rebound otherwise (5 on the night), only created one shot for himself the whole night (dropped one nice hook on Dalembert), but played kind of the ultimate roleplaying game for us. What he did requires not much talent besides knowing where to be on the court, but just by doing that he had a major impact on the game with 24pts on 10-11 shooting (and 9 of the 10 may have been dunks). Its why despite his limited skills, Mikki continues to have a role in this league whereas guys like Kenny Thomas or Reef cannot smoothly integrate into a system where they are not featured. Mikki did not make the game happen -- Brad did. But he was there again and again all night long whenever Brad or Beno or Cisco or whoever created something -- Mikki was the finisher, and the Sixers frontline looked helpless to stop it. I wanted to separate this grade from Brad's, but will do so only through these notes -- this is Mikki Moore here, and you may never see this sort of game from him again. Giving him less than an A for it would be kind of silly, even if he was not the best King on the floor tonight.

Miller ( A ) -- you know, in the early going this did not look like much. The lane was completely open with Brad back there in the first, and if you had asked me at the end of the half how he had played I would have shrugged. Hit some open jumpers, you know the rest. And yet you looked at the numbers and he was 5-6 from the field for 12pts 5rebs. Were the numbers deceptive? Or the perception defective? I do not know. But in either case he completely carved up the Sixers in amonster third quarter and completely resolved any gap between statistics and performance. This game was freakish -- we won our first road game, but you read it here first -- you will never see this frontcourt pairing domainatre a game like this again. Brad went for 25pts 10rebs 6ast on 9-12 shooting. Mikki 24pts 5rebs 1ast on 10-11 shooting. That was 49 points on 19-23 shooting combined, for one of the weakest frontcourts in the league (both in fact, and statistically). It was amazing. And Brad was the real engine. He seemed to hit every shot he took, and while he made a couple of bad passes, he just carved the Sixers up in the third with his passing. Dalembert can't play that style, Evans sucked, and their kid, Jason Smith, looked clueless. Throw int he fact that Mo Cheeks cannot coach and has not gotten the memo that Brad is best guarded by a SF, and there was no hope for the Sixers. You would call this a throwback game for Brad, except there has been no time in his career when 25pt 10reb 6ast games on 9-12 shooting were at all common. Just a great game by him, and finally delivered to us a road win.

Salmons ( B ) -- had a good but not great first half -- missed a lot of shots, but was aggressive and only sporadically impeded. Finsihed with 11 points, and was a solid presence. But ironically played his weakest while we played our best. Let Willie Green get a little out of his control in the third, and at a time when everybody else was swinging the ball, insisted on a nmumber of selfish one on one drives, many of which ended up as turnovers. Came back to redeem himself a bit late, as as we were struggling he hit a three and made a layup to help us hold the lead against the sputtering Sixers.

Beno ( C ) -- this was one scraggly, ugly game for Beno. He actually got pulled early in the first qaurter, and he was going bad enough that it could have been for multiple reasons -- maybe his nonexistent defense, his repeated turnovers, his forced shots. You had choices. Came back in, but just got creamed by Andre Miller all first quarter, and for that matter, all first half: at halftime had been outscored by Miller 18-0. Yikes. But like much of our team, deserved an entirely separate grade for the third quarter when he came out and woke up with 11pts in the quarter, and his arrival was maybe the signal that we were going to take off and finally win a road game. Promptly returned to his shaky play in the 4th, and was one of the main culprits as we did everything possible to give back the game we had won in the third (Philly was having none of it though -- gotta love bad teams playing each other). I'm really giving him a C here for one quarter of work resulting in satisfactory overall numbers, but this wasn't a good game for Beno.

Cisco ( B ) -- despite being the guy called upon to spell Beno in the first quarter, really gave us little or nothing in relief in the first. But came out and delivered a strong second quarter stint passing, as well as scoring himself. Was the beginning of the superior ball moevement that would peak for us in the third. Despite the strong quarter lost nearly all of his second half minutes I think mostly due to the great rhtyhtm the starters were in, but also potentially because of Reggie's knowledge of his unstable nature. In other words, we desperately needed to hold on, and Reggie may have decided Cisco was not worth the risk.

Thomas ( INC ) -- oh, wonderful first half. Truly. Managed to block his own shot with the backboard, which in itself is outstanding and mght have deserved an A here if I had chosen to grade him. Came back briefly in the second half, and did not kill us.

Hawes ( C+ ) -- pretty good start to his second quarter stint. Beneficiary of our passing that quarter, and made a good hustle play in the corner to save a ball going out of bounds. But began to have trouble finishing inside, and continues to not understand shot selection, resulting ina number of missed jumeprs as well. Unexpectedly got the call to take our final shot of the half, and tried to go one on one against Dalembert...er...not yet rook.

Douby ( INC ) -- short minutes and limited impact on a day when Beno did not have it. Also may have discovered a new competitor for some of his minutes in Dahntay Jones.

Jones ( INC ) -- I almost decided to go ahead and give him a grade, even though he, like Douby and KT, was hovering right around my grading cutoff point (6:00). One problem was that while he was not perfect, not spectacular, he, being Dante Jones, did everything I would have asked him too. He ran the break, made a nice drop off pass. Made a good defensive play (well...maybe not so much, but another night of incopmetent refs gave him the call anyway). Also turned it over, but nonetheless if I did give him a grade, it was going to be one of those interesting "do I give him an A for such short minutes, but playing well for Dante Jones? or "do I give him a B for such short minutes even though he may not play much better given such short minutes again because he is Dante Jones" decisions. So I just took the cowardly way out and gave him an INC instead. More than a little surprised he is getting any minutes really, as I thought him pinned behind Artest/Salmons/Cisco/Douby. But I think stole minutes from both of the latter two this time out.

Reggie ( ) -- We won! Holy crap -- we won a road game! As mentioned in the intro, what it basically came down to was we played one good quarter, while they played none. The first half was a long and tedious game of hot potato, wiht each team frantically trying to give the game back to the other before they accidentally picked up a woss. There was a funny thing that popped up on the Bee's website at halftime -- a blog from Sam Amick, who was in the building. This was at the bottom of it:
Quote:
UPDATE: I've heard of snoozer games, but are you kidding me? Someone is asleep on press row. I repeat (and I'm not exaggerating in the slightest), a member of the media is completely asleep. Arms crossed, head back, mouth so wide open Kyle Korver could probably bury a three in his throat from the floor! Priceless.

Amick's Full Blog:http://www.sacbee.com/static/weblogs...es/009630.html

But then the third quarter came about, and things changed, if only briefly. For about 8-10 minutes there, it was like the San Antonio game again, we were playing way over our head, and Brad and Mikki in particular simultaneously exploded for their best quarters, and games, of the season. And maybe if we are playign a good team, they withstand that run and find a way to hang in it. But we were playing the Sixers, and that should have been fatal. Indeed in the end was fatal, but not because we didn't endeavor mightily to let them back into it in the 4th. Reggie was a little impatient throughout this one, and was willing to get into it with Beno in particular for some sloppy play. But in the second half in particular you could see Reggie really pushing hard here for the win. Had no time to mess with secondary considerations like rotation patterns or getting guys minutes, or saving anything for tonight. He let it go for about 3 minutes in the early 4th, and then it was right back to the starting unit which had dominated the third to try to close it out. May have even been an interesting decision on his part to move Dahntay Jones up over Cisco in the rotation as we tried to close it -- Cisco certainly got the bulk of the minutes tonight, but down the stretch when Reggie had gotten almost silly in his subbing in and out of Artest because of foul trouble (think he yanked him in and out about 3-4 times in 2-3 minutes there), it was Dahntay he turned to for those minutes as a steady don't-screw-it-up roleplayer, rather than the unpredictable Cisco. In any case, we broke the bagel. Last team in the NBA to do so, and blew our opportunity to set a franchise record for road futility to start a season. Oh well. With the caliber of opponents coming up, not out of the question for there to be another one or two on this trip either.
 
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Warhawk

Give blood and save a life!
Staff member
#6
One character from Pulp Fiction has to make the list.

And Paul Muad'Dib from Dune. Anytime your name is a killing word, I think you qualify as "badass". ;)

And there's always Hudson from Aliens:

[special edition]
[during the drop to LV-426]
Hudson: I'm ready, man, check it out. I am the ultimate badass! State of the badass art! You do NOT wanna **** with me. Check it out! Hey Ripley, don't worry. Me and my squad of ultimate badasses will protect you! Check it out! Independently targeting particle beam phalanx. Vwap! Fry half a city with this puppy. We got tactical smart missiles, phase-plasma pulse rifles, RPGs, we got sonic electronic ball breakers! We got nukes, we got knives, sharp sticks...
Apone: Knock it off, Hudson. All right, gear up.

:D
 

Glenn

Hall of Famer
#7
One character from Pulp Fiction has to make the list.

And Paul Muad'Dib from Dune. Anytime your name is a killing word, I think you qualify as "badass". ;)

And there's always Hudson from Aliens:
A Dune nut, are you? I'll take back all the bad things I've said about you. :)

It's a joke. It's a joke. I've read all the books and suffered through the mediocre attempts at displaying this culture in movies. Mediocre but essential watching for me.
 

Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
#8
One character from Pulp Fiction has to make the list.

And Paul Muad'Dib from Dune. Anytime your name is a killing word, I think you qualify as "badass". ;)

And there's always Hudson from Aliens:

[special edition]
[during the drop to LV-426]
Hudson: I'm ready, man, check it out. I am the ultimate badass! State of the badass art! You do NOT wanna **** with me. Check it out! Hey Ripley, don't worry. Me and my squad of ultimate badasses will protect you! Check it out! Independently targeting particle beam phalanx. Vwap! Fry half a city with this puppy. We got tactical smart missiles, phase-plasma pulse rifles, RPGs, we got sonic electronic ball breakers! We got nukes, we got knives, sharp sticks...
Apone: Knock it off, Hudson. All right, gear up.

:D
And again, you sully the movie with a quote from the Director's Cut. Ugh. There's a reason those things get left ont he cutting room floor. ;)
 
#9
Jean Claude Van Damme -- you know, this was a hard one. The funny thing is that Jean claude is one of the more capable badasses out there -- he was a European Karate Champion before he became an "actor", and in theory could kick the living bejesus out of you. But he's just...such a damn pretty boy. He might kick your ***, but then again, maybe you would muss his hair or smudge his lipstick and he'd have to go spend half an hour in the powder room before resuming kicking your ***. In any case, got in in the end for his ability to drop into an impossibly painful split from a standing position. On any normal man, such a maneauver would instantly and permanently emasulate him. But not on this badass -- he can pop right out of it and flex his butt cheeks at you with a wink.

I think someone's watched Timecop a few too many times.
 

Warhawk

Give blood and save a life!
Staff member
#10
And again, you sully the movie with a quote from the Director's Cut. Ugh. There's a reason those things get left ont he cutting room floor. ;)
Hey, don't let your petty prejudices get in the way of a good list. Cut off you nose, and all that.
 
#12
Harrison Ford is a must here as well....Indiana Jones and Han Solo...not to mention some of his most famous badass scenes were his own idea (like saying "i know" when Leia says "i love you" or just shooting that guy with the sword in Raiders).

And one more suggestion...there cannot be a list of badasses without SEAN CONNERY.
 

CruzDude

Senior Member sharing a brew with bajaden
#17
I was thinking that "Shaft should be there among the "badasses" but no one played anything like how shaft was in the movies. Save him for later when someone deserves it.
 
#18
Van Damme exhudes as much machisimo as Pauly Shore. Well, at least you didn't throw Seagal in there. Between him and Van Damme, it's hard to say which of those glamour queens is the bigger prima donna. I've been told firsthand accounts of both of them from people who had to work with them (Seagal beyond his prime, Van Damme during it), and the histrionics they put on cast and crew could probably impress even Joan Crawford (or Faye Dunaway for that matter-- Faye truly is a wack job). Just goes to show you that kicking asses on screen doesn't exactly equate to being a badass. I'd throw my $.02 in for Sam Elliott since he's generally played one role over his career and does it well. I don't even need to say Sam Elliott. I can just say "Sam Elliott's voice," and the weight in his voice carries more testosterone than five Van Dammes.
 
#19

Jason Statham -- you know, its hard to add Euopeans to this type of list as there is so often an air of either the sophisticate or the effemiinate to Euro action stars which just does not reek badass. But now this guy is something else. Lantern jaw? Check. Tough guy stubble? Check. Kick your *** martial arts skills? Check. Mumbles unintelligibly? Check. Can deflect oncoming missles with a lunch platter? Check. I mean, what more do you want in a badass?
:D

You forgot "yummy."
 

Kingster

Hall of Famer
#24
Li is the baddest baddass of them all. When you win the martial arts championship of China, you're no pretender. I wish he would do more movies.
 
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