Grades v. Clippers 01/23

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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
Well that was...attractive. I suppose now in the manic depressive spirit of the board I should run off and start a "Kings are the worst team in the NBA!!" thread, but will refrain -- the truth, as it has always been, is somewhere in between. Not a playoff team. Not the T-Wolves. Good nights. Terrible nights. Although rarely will you see them back to back so starkly.

I am going to try to make use of the
spoiler
button for the theme tonight.

Theme will be: When They Were Hot (Old Age Sucks)


Artest ( D- ) -- No single player was as emblematic of our night and day 24hr turnaround in this one than Ron, who played so well and dominated so easily in Tuesday's home game against the Nets, adn came out and laid an egg tonight against the Clippers. Ron was quiet early but started some dumb forcing late in the first, and it was a sign of bad things to come. I don't know whether it was a coaching decision, or Ron's, but tonight we seemed absolutely bound and determined to take advanatage of the alleged mismatches Ron would theoretically create in the post, and so time and time again he would get the ball and grind, and bang, and waddle, and bang some more, and then throw up some junk. And it was all ugly, and just horrendously ineffective/inefficient. Even when he clearly had the mismatch working, we were getting minimal production out of that play. And Ron even got frustrated enough to come up with a technical -- quick note: since coming to the Kings Ron has been remarkably calm on the court. Very few outbursts or Ts, but last week he was uncommonly chippy, and I attributed it to the Blackhat factor (in DET and IND), but here it was again tonight. Something to watch. And the topper for this grade was that after initially slowing Maggette as expected, Ron ended up matched at both ends by rookie Al Thornton for most of the night, and it was a slaughter. And Thornton did the slaughtering! While Ron was grinding and forcing one on one to dubious effect Thornton showed no fear, and not only competed but took it right at Ron and beat him more often than not. Very impressive by Thornton, and while his rookie season has been erratic, this sort of performance makes me start to recant my doubts about him.
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Don't mess with this dame... I had a better shot than this -- a very nice glam headshot from this era, but seem to have lost track of it. Name that chica:
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Dame Judi Dench

Moore ( C- ) -- another forgotten game from Mikki. Did little out there, and was a bit misplaced against a Clippers team which has one giant center and then has little choice but to smallball with Tim Thomas, Thornton, etc. Came out in the third more active, as he did last night, but was all fumblethumbs again, repeatedly mishandling passes and losing balls in traffic. Some of that actually is on Mike who was making nice feeds....if you happen to be passing to Chris Webber. Mikki can't catch those, and I think the guys who have played with him all season might have a better feel for the sort of softballs you have to lob into him. In any case, unhappy with his own game, his lack of involvement, the whole team's mess, Mikki started to grimace and complain, and finally picked up a technical barking at the ref for a foul. Then they do finally call a foul for him, and Mikki, who is a 75% shooter, bricks them both, and was 0-3 on the ngiht. A pretty forgettable performance on a team full of them.
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With great beauty...
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Peter Parker's been holding out, his aunt's a hottie.
 
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Miller ( B- ) -- Kaman had the monster first quarter, although most of it was against Mikki, but Brad actually competed on a low level when they were close to each other. Began to get his numbers, but the contributions were almost lost in the face of the first half Kaman assault on the record books -- at one point Caveman was on pace to grab 40rebs in the game. Seemed to slip back into that hesitant to shoot oh damn what do I want to do mode again, and that hesitancy led to numerous bad passes for turnovers, as it normally does. Put up the best looking numbers on the team, but started getting chippy as the frustration built, doing the mental meltdown thing, losing focus, missing FTs, the normal Brad stuff, and was virtually no help as the blowout picked up steam.
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Normally I would avoid the type of shot above (I added the censoring) for this board. But this was just too classic. Who ya think the nude hottie is?
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Betty White -- None other than everybody's favorite ditzy grandmother. And now I have seen her naked.

Martin ( F ) -- this was just...bad. One of the worst games I can remember out of Kevin. Its not infrequent for him to have a crappy half, or even a lax game, but normally he will have a stretch of 5 or 6 minutes in even the lousiest game where he will briefly get things going, and rack up 8, 9, 10 points all at once to keep the statline respectable. Not tonight. He began teh game struggling, he ended the game struggling. He was even pseudo-benched for one long stretch there of the 3rd quarter. Struggled to start the game, missing his shots and turning it over. Briefly lurched to life in ugly fashion in the 2nd quarter, getting a lucky tri-bounce on a three, getting fouled, missing the second FT, but getting the offensive rebound as the Clippers did not block out and converting. Then he got a freebie on a technical FT. Ugly, rhythmless, but getting points one way or the other in scorer fashion. But that was literally it for the game for him. In the third could get nothing at all going against Quinton Ross, and maybe started to quit a bit out there. Just disappeared and looked slouchy in so doing, and with so many swingman bodies around begging for minutes, Reggie just kind of benched him after a couple of minutes of the third and looked elsewhere for a spark. Came back in in the early 4th and just had nothing. Missed everything out there. Layups, jumpers, even an alley-oop. As off as off can be, and with no redeeming contributions in other areas to make up for it.
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Alas this women burst on the scene too late in life for me to find anything more dramatic from her misspent youth.
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Brenda Bleythn
 
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Bibby ( B- ) -- off to his customary fast start against the Clippers with 9 points in about the first 6 minutes, and there for a bit you were thinking same ole same ole with Mike -- if there were no Los Angeles clippers in the league, you could probably knock about a point per game off of his career averages. So it looked like another one of those games, and Mike was going to carry us until we got going, then maybe add another burst in the third, and one more in the 4th as needed, and the Clippers as it has always been were never going to figure out an answer. Except that's not what happened. Mike slowed dramatically after the opening burst, and began to miss from all over the court, but especially from three where we made up for our ridiculous shooting against the Nets by bricking wide open looks tonight. Mike did continue doing an excellent job running the break on into the thrid quarter, and that was keeping us breathing at least for a while. But in the halfcourt sets he joined the rest of the gang in resorting to a lot of one on one, and when he did try to run some sets, often with Brad or Mikki, they usually ended in either miscommunication or fumbled passes.
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So what you think? Hot? Or not?
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Gena Rowlands -- What about now? Did I mention getting old sucks?

Salmons ( C ) -- the ego healed overnight, and he was back. Well kinda. Still not what he was as a starter, but now more like what he has always been as a backup -- i.e. inconsistent bencher with flashes of more. Made one nice move along the baseline in the early going, and set up Cisco for one of his threes. Also committed a shot clock violation and the unmentioned part of the is he pouting or not debate is that he also continues to look ragged and sloppy out there since the troops returned. Not playing well or in rhythm no matter where his head is. Hit a wide open three late in the third that briefly had us back up but was otherwise very quiet in the second half when we could have used the spark. Missed FTs as well in what was one of the more obvious teamwide expressions of lack of focus you are likely to see. 8pts 3rebs on 3-8 shooting off the bench, and gee aren't those numbers familiar. That's the career right there.
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This one is almost too notorious, but as you can see from the pic above she was just such a hottie that I felt compelled.
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Joan Collins
 
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Udrih ( D ) -- and a night after being perfect from the field, beno comes out and was perfct again. Just not in a good way. Airballed his first shot and it was a portent of things to come. Never able to get anything going and never really attacked the way he did the night before. Tried to set some people up, but for the most part his efforts were wasted with guys either missing or getting their feet tangled and having to dump it off. Finished with a completely ineffectual o-fer.
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Odd how many of these are Brits. Do their careers last longer? Accent? Culture?
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Maggie Smith -- do you think Harry Potter will be hot for teacher after seeing these pics?

Cisco ( B ) -- came in off the bench and continued his torrid 3pt shooting -- for the last few weeks if he is open, has he has his feet set, no time to think too much, its 100% automatic. Drained three of them in the second quarter and was the primary weapon keeping us ahead. Better yet, did not even think about taking anything else, so his first half line was 3-3 field, 3-3 3pt, 9pts. Added three assists as we again racked up many more of those than we have been doing throughout the season -- had 15 at half (whcih was remarkable because we really weren't playing terribly well). Was one of the few guys fighing in the late third (the numbers do not show it, but actually had his scrawny body inside fighting on the boards) but to little effect as he joined the rest of the team in just going away after half.
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This is kind of a gimme, because its not from that long ago, and she was quite famous as one of the top hotties of her generation.
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Kelly McGillis -- and I wish I could have found a better pic of this because...damn, I saw her in some godawful scifi flick this summer and her deterioration was shocking -- didn't even recognize her. Looked about 70, and she is not that old. Nothing wrong with looking 70 if you are -- everybody gets old -- but when you are only about 50 and played Tom Cruise's love interest a mere two decades ago, and he's now hitched up with another 20 something nubile honey and you look like your grandmother...well like I say rather shocking.
 
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Jones ( C+ ) -- in in a bit of a desperation move at the end of the third to try to spark us with some energy, and briefly looked to be helping. Briefly. The effect slacked off, and he was out a mintue later and did not return until garbagetime. In the garbagetime battled on the glass but was otherwise only modestly effective, and his poor FT shooting reared its head again (as with the rest of the team).
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Hottie!
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Helen Mirren -- still classy looking but...*sigh*...life sucks

Hawes ( INC ) -- garbagetime
Justin ( INC ) -- garbagetime
Douby ( INC ) -- garbagetime

Reggie ( ) --
 
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- outrebounded by 10
- 21 turnovers
- 50% from the line
- Mr. Illadvised (Artest)/Grown Man B.I. (Bibby)/K. Marty-Mar (Martin) combine for 13-45 (28%) from the field

...simply not gonna get it done.
 
Bricklaqyer said:
Artest - D ... quick note: since coming to the Kings Ron has been remarkably calm on the court. Very few outbursts or Ts, but last week he was uncommonly chippy, and I attributed it to the Blackhat factor (in DET and IND), but here it was again tonight. Something to watch.

I agree. The ticking is definitely getting louder...and more ominous.
 
Question: Are teams just guarding Kevin that well? After his first two ridiculously hot games after he came back, it seems like it's been a downhill slide in his shooting. I'm not picking on Martin, because no one played well last night, or even close to well. Just wondering if my impression is right or off.:confused:
 
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Question: Are teams just guarding Kevin that well? After his first two ridiculously hot games after he came back, it seems like it's been a downhill slide in his shooting. I'm not picking on Martin, because no one played well last night, or even close to well. Just wondering if my impression is right or off.:confused:

I think that getting back in the game shape takes time. First couple of games he played on freshness and adrenaline. Kevin will be fine
 
Question: Are teams just guarding Kevin that well? After his first two ridiculously hot games after he came back, it seems like it's been a downhill slide in his shooting. I'm not picking on Martin, because no one played well last night, or even close to well. Just wondering if my impression is right or off.:confused:

It is absolutely not because of how the other team is guarding him. He's not bringing it. His body language is so transparent - he's not playing with the edge that makes him extremely good - the edge that he had the first couple of games. He's playing like a kid whose out there having fun making millions, buying into the fact that he is good and has nothing to prove, as opposed to going out there on the court like a shark wanting to devour his opponent. He's back in the secondary dependent role now that the parents (Bibby and Artest) are back. Complacency is his worst enemy.
 
I am not blaming it all on Artest, because they all sucked, but dang.. WTF is up with Artest? We had the game close, than Artest starts trying to do everythign himself. F-

Also, Moore has hands of stone. He is just a bad starting PF... He can't even catch a freaking ball. We will be a crappy team unless we put a REAL starting PF in there. F-

The reast of the team I am going to give a INC to because they didn't purposely screw up like Artest, an Moore did :)
 
Question: Are teams just guarding Kevin that well? After his first two ridiculously hot games after he came back, it seems like it's been a downhill slide in his shooting. I'm not picking on Martin, because no one played well last night, or even close to well. Just wondering if my impression is right or off.:confused:


I think Ron and Mike froze him out.
 
I agree with piksi about Kevin. He is double teamed some, but he's just not back to being smooth. Just freaky, but I see Mikki Moore without fingers!!!
Catch the damn ball, Mikki. Annie.
 
Fun theme!

Or... possibly depressing theme, depending on how you look at it.

In either case, a couple of my favorite examples of the suckitude of aging:

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Yet another Brit.

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Angela Lansbury -- [ this was supposed to be the surprised smiley, but apparently that counts as a fifth image ], she wrote.

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And this is one that can probably be figured out before the big reveal, but (for some unknown reason) just completely shocked me as a child.

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Lucille Ball -- obviously the difference between the glam shot and Lucy in her final years is yikes! level, but who'd've thought that, before her official entry into public consciousness as the zaniest of zany redheads, the Lucille Ball of the 30's and 40's was a model and a bit of a sex pot?
 
And now, to fully embrace the more depressing aspect of this theme AND to dispel the myth that this is a strictly female phenomenon:

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Not going to even bother with a clever lead-in, here. There's no hiding the identity of this hunk o' perfection.

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Marlon Brando -- and, believe me, there are plenty of images that show this difference even more dramatically, but... I just didn't have the heart to post them.

Now, please excuse me while I go and cry.
 
My younger cousin knows how much I love the Kings so he sent me a TMZ link about Artest. I thought is was funny at first (Ron is getting rejected entry to a night club). Then I started to wonder if it happened in LA the night BEFORE the Clipper game. I usually do not care how a player spends his off time, but he really didn't play well during the game. I watched it again and I think that the guy behind him may have been Douby, but I am not sure.
The good thing is that he kept his cool. That was impressive.

http://http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1388813887
 
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