Island of Pain and Misery Draft --- draft completed

vikinginferno

vikinginferno

Starter
#421
#421
Blood Instead of Water



I hate seeing blood, especially lots of it, but I can't imagine seeing blood everywhere I look and also having to drink it as that will be the only thing I am able to drink on my island, blood, human blood. Blood will replace the ocean water and I will see blood all the way out into the horizon. Blood will often flow up and go over me and sometimes I will receive infections or diseases from this blood. I can't imagine my life getting any worse, but it will with my next picks...
 
D-Mass

D-Mass

Starter
#422
#422
Next up...

MY ALARM CLOCK



The picture above is not my alarm clock...I couldn't find one. I've had mine since college, and every roommate I have ever had since then has said that it is the most obnoxious alarm clock they have ever heard. My wife would probably make this her first pick in this draft. Every time I begin to fall asleep on my island, my alarm clock will go off.
 
D-Mass

D-Mass

Starter
#423
#423
Now begins the section of this draft I'll call, "things I hate that everyone else seems to love." These picks won't win me any votes, but I have to be true to myself. I'm not in this for the win.

GUM


Bubble-gum alley: San Luis Obispo...my personal nightmare...

I know this probably makes me weird, but I think gum is the most vile substance known to man. I have only chewed one piece of gum in my lifetime, and that was slipped to me via a jawbreaker when I was a kid. I hated it then and I hate it now. I hate stepping in it, I hate seeing it on walls, furniture, etc....I hate the smell of it and I hate the sight of people chewing it obnoxiously. People have the right to chew on it if they want to, but with the variety of mints on the market today, can't people freshen their breath with those instead???

:p
 
vikinginferno

vikinginferno

Starter
#424
#424
Queasiness



Whenever I get the horrible feeling of queasiness, I want to get to barfing so I can get the queasiness over with. On my island, I will forever be queasy and never able to get that feeling away.
 
Warhawk

Warhawk

Give blood and save a life!
Staff member
#426
#426
No PM from Larry89. :mad: Thanks Jespher for picking up the slack.

OK, to further increase my pain and misery quotient, I am selecting:

Slivers under my fingernails and toenails.

Metal shavings. Bamboo slivers. Toothpicks. Doesn't matter. I have rioting Laker fans relishing in torturing me by continuously jabbing all these things and more into these very painful locations. Over and over and over again. Everyone had done this at least once in their life and know how painful this is......
 
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SLAB

SLAB

Hall of Famer
#429
#429
With GeraldWallace#3 forfeiting his position in the draft, is there any stander-by who wants to join the party and make 4 makeup picks?

It's fun!
:p
 
SLAB

SLAB

Hall of Famer
#430
#430
And kingsnation swoops in and steps up for GW#3

I just sent the PM, and kingsnation can start the make-up's ASAP!
WelcomeAboard!
:)
 
kingsnation

kingsnation

All-Star
#432
#432
Forgive me all if I accidently pick something that's been taken. I've looked over the front page and didn't see this, but you never know...


Make-up pick 1..



Constant Feelings of Loneliness
 
Jespher

Jespher

Starter
#436
#436
kingsnation said:
Forgive me all if I accidently pick something that's been taken. I've looked over the front page and didn't see this, but you never know...


Make-up pick 1..
Constant Feelings of Loneliness
Click to expand...
Yeah, you get that a lot when you're locked inside a sauna with dead bodies for the rest of your life :p.
 
Jespher

Jespher

Starter
#439
#439
My life is pain! I’m exhausted, I’m wet, I’m disoriented beyond belief, and I’m so, so cold. I’m sick from eating mass quantities of raw sewage, and I’m terrified out of my mind by all these horrific hallucinations and voices (real and imagined). I’m in excruciating pain from the jellyfish stings and falling down the escalator stairs, and the fibromyalgia is magnifying it all ten fold. On top of that, I’ve got this other “problem” to deal with. With my 11th pick, I choose:

Eternal Priapism



Priapism is a potentially harmful and painful medical condition in which the erect penis does not return to its flaccid state, despite the absence of both physical and psychological stimulation, within four hours. Priapism is considered a medical emergency, which should receive proper treatment by a qualified medical practitioner.
I’ve been having this problem ever since my “surgery”, and at first I didn’t think much of it. I was indeed lying naked in a dark cell with no other stimulation. However, I grew more concerned as the days passed. It’s now been at least 8 weeks since my imprisonment and I don’t think it will ever go away. I think there were some extra chemicals in those hallucinogenic drug pumps Cthulhu’s minions implanted.

The pain is unbearable! It feels like my loins are constantly burned by acid, while being viciously bludgeoned. The agony eases somewhat when I can prevent anything from touching me down there, but that is quite hard to manage while falling down the escalator stairs. When I urinate it feels like I am peeing glass! Worst of all, the jellyfish like to wrap their tentacles around anything that protrudes…

More: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Priapism
 
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SLAB

SLAB

Hall of Famer
#442
#442
Friendly Reminder:: To all drafters, remember both a food and drink is required to *live* on your miserable island.

Just reminding to remember because this draft is winding down and some islands are without food/drink or both.

Happy picking!
 
NoBonus

NoBonus

Starter
#443
#443
Sorry about the time out... here is my pick; the inhabitants of my island will be engaged in a never-ending religious war. Using religious beliefs as the basis for their ongoing conflict, half of the fat, elderly nudists will battle the other half in the sort of war, that, since their core beliefs drive them, has no rules or boundaries...BTW, there are no real "weapons" on the island so far, so the war will be bloody and brutal... and I am in charge of the island and responsible for the well being of it's inhabitants let's not forget...
 
jalfa

jalfa

Starter
#448
#448
So, I already have my very own private torturer in place in Dr. Mengele. However, he's more interested in things like burning people alive to find out at what temperature and time what level of burn wounds occur and there is quite another side to torture. For this reason, I need someone, who is an expert inthat field that person would be Donatien Alphonse François de Sade, better known as the Marquis de Sade.



De Sade was a French aristocrat in the time before, during and after the French Revolution. He gained notoriety for his exuberant lifestyle that featured prostitutes, maids of both sexes, drugs and violence. It was his depravity that might have led to his being left alone by the revolutionaries, as he was a prisoner in the Bastille when the revolution started and had adopted a political position that was very compatible with the revolutionaries themselves. What got him there in the first place, however, had very little to do with any ideological contradiction to the king, but was rather a product of his lifestyle, as several of the participants of his orgy were not quite as complacent as he would've liked it and needed some intoxication before engaging in any of the outlined activities. So basically he was sued by a couple of prostitutes, whom he had drugged and raped. As for the violent aspect of the whole thing, just know that the term sadism was actually derived from his name. So he basically was the grandfather of all of todays dominatrixes...or their leering uncle, you be the judge.

Anyway, let's put it this way, on my island, the marquis will be entertaining guests on a regular basis and I will be the entertainment.
 
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SLAB

SLAB

Hall of Famer
#449
#449


The Black Hole (Raider Fans)

I hate these idiots.
Now them is all of their rioting, assaultive, face-painted, skull wearing, obnoxiousness will forever be running wild on my island.

And their leader is their very own Al Davis, who will only support their utter ridiculousness.
 
kingsnation

kingsnation

All-Star
#450
#450
I've had very bad experiences with Raider fans.

I once went to a game where I was cheering for the Broncos, and people threatened to rip my fingers off my hand and also many threw beer at me. If I hadn't stopped cheering, I can't imagine what would've happened to me! :eek:

Great pick.
 
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