Island of Pain and Misery Draft --- draft completed

With this pick, I select the one thing that would make my island life incredibly hard, incredibly stressful: Personal Responsibility for everything on the island.

This means, if the elderly meth heads get sick, I got to clean it up. If they get hurt, I have to nurse them back to health. If the Macarena stops playing, I have to go turn it back on. If the asphalt needs new tar, I have to re-tar the asphalt. If the hospital tent needs the giant pile of limbs cleared away, I have to do it. Basically, I will be on the run from task to task almost non-stop and personally responsible for the results, so if something goes wrong, it is on me; I am to blame and no one else.
 
So far I have plenty of emotional and psychological pain and misery on my island. My loved ones are being tortured and murdered, we're forced to live on raw sewage in dark, dank, cramped subterranean prison cells, as we lose our sanity to hallucinogenic attacks and electrical seizure causing shocks. To top all that off, since my "surgery" at the hands of Cthulhu, I also have come down with this painful condition. Even the slightest touch is now very painful as I now have a heightened pain response (tactile allodynia). I cannot sleep for more than an hour at a time, my joints, bones, and muscles are deteriorating, and I'm experiencing trouble swallowing, bowel/bladder incontinence and irregularities, full body paresthesias, difficulty breathing, myloclonus (hyperactive motor reflexes), and cognitive dysfunction (aside from the hallucinogenic effects). I am of course refering to my 6th choice which is:

Fibromyalgia



This disease sucks. It won't kill you, but it will make life miserable in every sense of the word. Jalfa mentioned that he hates insomnia, yeah, Fibromyalgia causes it, and some theorize that the inability to get deep sleep over the long term progresses the disease to it's more serious stages.

Signs and Symptoms:
The defining symptoms of fibromyalgia are chronic, widespread pain and painful response to touch (allodynia). Other symptoms can include moderate to severe fatigue, needle-like tingling of the skin, muscle aches, prolonged muscle spasms, weakness in the limbs, nerve pain, functional bowel disturbances, and chronic sleep disturbances. Sleep disturbances may be related to a phenomenon called alpha-delta sleep, a condition in which deep sleep (associated with delta waves) is frequently interrupted by bursts of alpha waves, which normally occur during wakefulness. Slow-wave sleep is often dramatically reduced.


Many patients experience cognitive dysfunction (known as "brain fog" or "fibrofog"), which may be characterized by impaired concentration, problems with short and long-term memory, short-term memory consolidation, impaired speed of performance, inability to multi-task, cognitive overload, diminished attention span, anxiety, and depressive symptoms. "Brain fog" may be directly related to the sleep disturbances experienced by sufferers of fibromyalgia.


Other symptoms often attributed to fibromyalgia that may possibly be due to a comorbid disorder include myofascial pain syndrome also referred to as Chronic Myofascial Pain, diffuse non-dermatomal paresthesias, functional bowel disturbances and irritable bowel syndrome (possibly linked to lower levels of ghrelin, genitourinary symptoms and interstitial cystitis, dermatological disorders, headaches, myoclonic twitches, and symptomatic hypoglycemia. Although fibromyalgia is classified based on the presence of chronic widespread pain, pain may also be localized in areas such as the shoulders, neck, low back, hips, or other areas. Many sufferers also experience varying degrees of facial pain and have high rates of comorbid temporomandibular joint disorder.


Eye problems such as eye pain, sensitivity to light, blurred vision, and fluctuating visual clarity, can also be a symptom of the condition. As a consequence of this, sufferers who wear glasses or contact lenses may have to change their lens prescription frequently.

Symptoms can have a slow onset, and many patients have mild symptoms beginning in childhood, that are often misdiagnosed as growing pains. Symptoms are often aggravated by unrelated illness or changes in the weather. They can become more or less tolerable throughout daily or yearly cycles; however, many people with fibromyalgia find that, at least some of the time, the condition prevents them from performing normal activities such as driving a car or walking up stairs. The disorder does not cause inflammation as is characteristic of rheumatoid arthritis, although some non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs may temporarily reduce pain symptoms in some patients. Their use, however, is limited, and often of little to no value in pain management.
You know the feeling of increased pain/sensitivity around a fresh wound. Well, that's what my whole body constantly feels like with this crappy disease. Don't touch me, it HURTS!
[yt=Fibromyalgia]941kVoQh9_s[/yt]
More: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fibromyalgia
 
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Bricklayer

Don't Make Me Use The Bat
Whoa! That picture isn't safe for this board period! I don't care how many little scientific facts are plastered over her. You'll need another pic, and less anatomically correct this time.
 
fixed :)

You might want to put a spoiler on that Hasselhoff pic too. I'm sure it might not be appropriate for work either...
 
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Warhawk

Give blood and save a life!
Staff member
Well, I have my food. Next is my water. In keeping with the spirit of the draft (I think) is my selection of a "beverage" that really is used for drinking (unlike some other "beverage" choices so far):








Common "drinking" water from Mexico with perpetual Montezuma's Revenge.

A couple quotes from here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A520868

This is an entry about the condition of the drinking water in much of Mexico, the consequences of drinking it, remedies for what happens to your body if you do drink it, and tips for the prevention of some of the worst effects of drinking it. You see, Mexico is a famous example of a place where drinking the 'drinking water' may have serious, sometimes comical, sometimes embarrassing, sometimes dangerous, but always memorable consequences. It should also be noted that Mexico is by no means the only - or even the worst - place where 'drinking water' is not all that it is cracked up to be.
[FONT=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]What is Drinking Water?[/FONT]
The term 'drinking water' is used very loosely. It should be used to describe large collections of molecules of hydrogen and oxygen atoms, bonded in a ratio of two to one (respectively), that are fit for human consumption. It is often not used this way. Rather, it is used to describe large collections of hydrogen and oxygen atoms, bonded in a ratio of two to one (respectively), that are being used for human consumption . There is a huge difference between those two statements that one's intestines may be quicker to appreciate than one's brain.
An example of how the term 'drinking water' is commonly (though wrongly) used, is the description of the water in Mexico as 'drinkable'.
[FONT=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Water in Mexico[/FONT]
The drinking water in Mexico is notorious worldwide for not being entirely drinkable for travellers. Yet the rural inhabitants of Mexico do drink it with no ill effects. This is mainly because they have built up a tolerance to it from drinking it all their lives. Many visitors to Mexico would consider the drinking water to be undrinkable, because so many of them become violently sick for 24-48 hours if they drink it. The reason is that the water is home to many and various single-celled organisms, which, as a group, are generally considered to be parasites. These inhabitants of the water do not mind being swallowed at all. They expect it, and love being swallowed. The parasites will use the unwary drinker as a host and, as a reward, will make the drinker violently ill for what often seems like an eternity. The notorious consequences of drinking Mexican drinking water are collectively described as 'Montezuma's Revenge' in honour of the late, great Aztec ruler whose hospitality to visitors from Spain was so rudely repaid.
[FONT=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Montezuma's Revenge[/FONT]
The consumption of tiny animal-infested water in Mexico will result in discomfort (often dire) for the person who drinks it. But what, specifically, can happen? Well, many things can... and usually do. The consequences can include:
  • Diarrhoea
  • Stomach cramping
  • Nausea
  • Light-headedness
  • Fever
... and other equally discomforting things, depending on the consumer and his or her allergies and general predisposition to the collywobbles.
[FONT=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Remedies and Prevention[/FONT]
If a person finds that they are sick after consuming any Mexican water, they should immediately contact a Poison Control Centre, and follow any instructions given. Usually, the discomfort will quickly take its course and be gone within 48 hours. Here are some prevention tips:
  • Do not drink Mexico's tap water, unless it is a life or death situation.
I only listed the first, because the rest pale in comparison.

From: http://www.cancunsouth.com/plan_hel_main.html

The cliche about Mexico is that tourist shouldn't drink the water. South of Cancun, even the locals don't drink the water. The water table in the Yucatan is very close to the surface, and is contaminated by garbage dumps and runoff. Even in the poorest sections, the corner store sells huge bottles of purified water and kids drag carts filled with bottles to sell.
So there it is - all I get to drink is highly contaminated "drinking" water from south of Cancun and have Montezuma's Revenge for the rest of my life. Yipee!
 
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wow...lol...Makeup Pick #1

Amputated Arms and Legs



No arms and legs, I will live the rest of my life on this Island with no arms or legs. Really I'll leave your imagination to figure the rest.
 
Spiders



I'm not scared of a ton of things, but spiders really freak me out. I even get scared just looking at these pictures of spiders. There's going to be spiders all over the island, everywhere I look there's going to be big, hairy spiders. There's going to be spiders crawling all over me, some biting me and causing me pain and itchiness to go along with my fear of spiders.
 

SLAB

Hall of Famer
Spiders



I'm not scared of a ton of things, but spiders really freak me out. I even get scared just looking at these pictures of spiders. There's going to be spiders all over the island, everywhere I look there's going to be big, hairy spiders. There's going to be spiders crawling all over me, some biting me and causing me pain and itchiness to go along with my fear of spiders.
Ill let this one slide, but lets not get into the habit of picking an entire family of creatures.

I don't want the next person picking Food, and justifying it with Maggot Cheese, Escamoles and the Durian Fruit all being on the island because of his huge blanket he chose.

Keep it pretty specific.
 
Here's my drink:

CHICHA

Not the processed, commercialized stuff...this stuff:



From wikipedia: Chicha de jora is prepared by germinating maize, extracting the malt sugars, boiling the wort, and fermenting it in large vessels, traditionally huge earthenware vats, for several days.

In some cultures, instead of germinating the maize to release the starches therein, the maize is ground, moistened in the chicha maker's mouth, and formed into small balls which are then flattened and laid out to dry. Naturally occurring ptyalin enzymes in the maker's saliva catalyses the breakdown of starch in the maize into maltose.


I saw it made on a travel show once...it was pretty nasty to see people chewing up and spitting this stuff out (look closely in above picture) only to see people drink it later.
 
Ill let this one slide, but lets not get into the habit of picking an entire family of creatures.

I don't want the next person picking Food, and justifying it with Maggot Cheese, Escamoles and the Durian Fruit all being on the island because of his huge blanket he chose.

Keep it pretty specific.
The thing is, I don't hate any or really know any specific species of spiders. I would rather not go looking for some specific type of spider to put on here when I don't really know anything about it. But thanks for letting it slide and the reminder to try and keep things more specific and for my next picks I will try to keep them as specific as possible. :)
 
First pick in the next round:

BARNEY



Can't think of anything more annoying than to have Barney on my island of misery telling me how happy I should be.
 
Perez Hilton



This guy is a complete jerk, gossiping about everyone on his little blog. He does so many things that are extremely disrespectful such as trying to get people who he thinks are gay to confess that they are gay. When Michael Jackson died he just said it was a publicity stunt. He talks so much about other people and then when he got punched he acted as if he was completely innocent and I definitely didn't feel any sympathy for him.

On my island he will be gossiping about everyone and just running around being a complete jerk.
 
I dont want to be a baby here, but allowing "spiders" seems to cover way too much. I myself was planning on selecting a certain variety of spider, now I am SOL.

I think i might take reptiles next.
 

SLAB

Hall of Famer
I dont want to be a baby here, but allowing "spiders" seems to cover way too much. I myself was planning on selecting a certain variety of spider, now I am SOL.

I think i might take reptiles next.
Already called out.

Ill let this one slide, but lets not get into the habit of picking an entire family of creatures.

I don't want the next person picking Food, and justifying it with Maggot Cheese, Escamoles and the Durian Fruit all being on the island because of his huge blanket he chose.

Keep it pretty specific.
Im letting 'Spiders' slide, because there was no rule in place for 'blanket' picks.
If you still pick your exact species, that species would be on your island, and not on the 'Spider pick' island.
 

Warhawk

Give blood and save a life!
Staff member
I think I need to further explain how much pain and misery I will really be in - when I am not attending to my other duties (gathering escomales from poisonous ant colonies, etc.), I will be on the Rack.

There might be some more painful tortures, but they all mostly lead to death. The rack, if used properly, does not, and therefore is very appropriate for my "non-pleasurable" stay on my island. From wiki:

The rack is a torture device that consists of an oblong rectangular, usually wooden frame, slightly raised from the ground, with a roller at one, or both, ends, having at one end a fixed bar to which the legs were fastened, and at the other a movable bar to which the hands were tied. The victim's feet are fastened to one roller, and the wrists are chained to the other.

As the interrogation progresses, a handle and ratchet attached to the top roller are used to very gradually stepwise increase the tension on the chains, inducing excruciating pain. By means of pulleys and levers this roller could be rotated on its own axis, thus straining the ropes until the sufferer's joints were dislocated and eventually separated.

Additionally, once muscle fibers have been stretched past a certain point they lose their ability to contract, thus victims who were released had ineffective muscles as well as problems arising from dislocation.

Because of its mechanically precise, graded operation, it was particularly suited for hard interrogation, as to extract a confession.[citation needed]
One gruesome aspect of being stretched too far on the rack is the loud popping noises made by snapping cartilage, ligaments or bones.
So, in addition to the incredible amounts of pain I am enduring because of the torture itself, I have to try to function with ineffective and dislocated extremeties. I am sure I would be praying for death at this point, but that is not in the cards. I am sure my rioting Laker fan "friends" will have a lot of fun with that.....
 
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Larry89

Disgruntled Kings Fan
Sorry all, ive been really busy lately, I have a Night Calculus class and before that I have organic Chemistry both summer classes