So several years back a buddy of mine and I went to a pretty nice steak and seafood place for dinner. We got there kinda late in the evening and after the waiter read off the specials he said, "Also, I should let you know that seeing as it's coming towards closing time the chef tells me we only have one lobster and one filet mignon left, so if you want one of those you'd better jump. Ready to order?"
I look at my buddy, he looks at me, and we kinda nod our heads. I made a little hand signal over to him offering to let him start off, but he said, "No, no, you go first."
"OK, well in that case I'll have the filet," I said.
"Really?" my buddy said, with a bit of incredulity in his voice. "Well, I'll have that last lobster, then!" And the waiter thanked us and headed off to the kitchen with our order.
"You know, I let you go first," my buddy said. "Why didn't you go for the lobster?"
"Lobster's good," I said, "but I really was feeling like some red meat tonight."
"Yeah, you shoulda gone for that lobster," he said.
Well, the food finally came, and let me tell you, my filet was fantastic. But there was my buddy across the table, cutting off a bit of lobster, dipping it in the drawn butter, and saying, "Daaaaamn this lobster is good. Man, you coulda had this lobster. How's that filet? Is it all right? Looks like they mighta overcooked it a bit." "Naw, man, it's great," I insisted, but he dipped into his butter again, saying, "Bro, you definitely coulda had this lobster. My God, this is amazing lobster, man. What were you thinking with that filet when you coulda had lobster? And this rice pilaf side here, this is the bomb! Got these little capers in it, man I just love me some capers. That garlic mash doing OK for you, because, man, it looks like there might be some lumps in that stuff, bro. Daaaaaamn, I never had lobster like this!" This kind of thing went on all night.
I never invited that guy out to dinner again.
