Bricklayer
Don't Make Me Use The Bat
And here I thought I was almost going to miss this one and have to record it. Too bad I found a way around that. Oh, and for all of you who for some reason decided to miss a Thursday night game against OKC, and instead tune in for a Saturday night (when you really should have something better to do) game against the Suns...you dumb. 
So...we were spectacularly stupid this game, mysteriously so, as all bleeping night long we made ridiculously bad decisions on what to shoot and what not to shoot. If was like somebody had a magic 8 ball out there, and whatever it said to do our guy would do, no matter what the defense looked like, time on clock, or game situation.
Biggest blame ON the court goes to Tyreke, who has an amazing stat attached to him where we are 8-4 when he scores 20+ pts, and now 2-13 when he does not. As he goes, we go, and he just can't have games like this. Just can't.
However, I was also unamused by the shooting PG we drafted who could neither shoot nor handle the ball well enough to play PG against pressure defense, the saavy veteran leader we signed who made some of the dumbest plays of the night, nor especially the coach, who I thought basically ****ed up every single rotation of the entire night, never had the right guys together, overplayed guys who sucked, underplayed guys who didn't, and in general chipped into this loss as much as he helped the win on Thursday. We lost by 14, but never made a single real run in this one.
So I'm depressed. You depressed? Good. Girls.
As for flavor of girls? I had something else in mind, but I think I'll pluck a request, although maybe not quite in the same FFF cup spirit in which it was offered. At least not all of the time. So we're going to do British Babes, because really for such a scruffy little island they've done quite well over the years. I'm not an Anglophile per se, but I generally like the Brits. Tough stubborn people at their peak. Conquered the largest empire in history marching around in bright red coats begging to be shot at. And there weren't many of them either. England itself is only about a third the size of California. Even if you make it the whole UK with Scotland and Northern Ireland its still only a little over half. And they chopped down all their trees in the Industrial Revolution. Their idea of a forest we call a grove. (Nottingham forest is now literally about 500 acres). And they got real big into sheep back there, so most of the land was walled off and their aren't many wild animals left either. And their mountains...if you've ever been there you should go to their "peaks" district just for a laugh. I built sand volcanos that were bigger than that when I was a kid. Feel kind of bad for them, like maybe we should lend them a real mountain or something since we've got spares. Would anybody really notice if one of the Rockies went missing? Or maybe we could send them a volcano from the Cascades. Those things are trouble anyway. Anyway...scruffy little island, in fact many people even like to complain about the weather, although personally I prefer it to all the boring sun worshipping by all you warm weather wimp types. Unless of course you are a girl. And hot. And prone to wearing bikniis and lounging around in said sun, in which case you may still be a warm weather wimp, but you are my kind of warm weather wimp....Now where was I? Oh yes, scruffy little island. But they've done great things. And one of their great things has been producing a long line of hotties. And hotties speaking in cute little British accents too (although to a Brit the idea of a single "British" accent is comical, as they themselves draw so many lines between them they can tell which side of the street somebody is from just from how they talk. Not to mention of course that they invented the damn language, so its we who have the accents.). But anyway, time to get a move on, so again, welcome to Pretty Girls: British Babes Edition. Now onto the grades:
Boxscore
Salmons (D ) -- you know, I highlighted Reke's off game because he is often very very good, and when he flames out, that knocks out a big pillar of what you are trying to do. But there were a bunch of people struggling in this one, its just that we are so used to them sucking it feels like just a shrug. Exhibit A: Salmons, John. So John, who once gave us a 21-11-10 triple double in an earlier lifetime, sank back with a nifty 4-1-1 outing this time. Hit his first little pullup, and in fact had both of his hits in the early going. It was an upside game for him because from the start we looked uncomfrotable, and John himself was working hard on defense but having all kinds of problems against non-threats like Ghost of Hill and Diudley. Picked up three fouls in the first 9 minutes trying to stay with those thoroughbreds, neither of whom was averaging double figures coming into this game. As we often have seemed to do, came out of the halftime making it a priority to get Salmons, of all our guys, going. He bricked it and promptly disappeared. Not from the lineup though, as whatever pictures he has of Smart with those sheepmust be truly perverse. Maybe involving mutual shearing or something. Most annoygin thing about his, and half of our lineup's games was the sheer stupidity of their shot selction. The Phoenix Suns absolutely rubbed our noses in our lack of shooting, often collapsing all 5 guys down into the paint to form a little ball of ben gay and dentures, and time and time again fools like Salmosn would absolutely refuse to take the wide open jumpers they were thus presented on the perimeter, and instead put the ball on teh floor, dribble around like Travis Outlaw, and then force up some heavily contested crap into some geezers chest. I couldn't be a coach in the face of such dumbness. I would be calling guys over to the sideline and slapping them silly on national TV.
Kelly LeBrock -- now as she has aged there has grown to be rather too much of Ms. LeBrock, but back in her heyday the Weird Science/Lady In Red hottie was routinely listed on all the hottest women lists.
Thompson ( D+ ) -- minutes limited tonight by game dynamics and lack of brains, both his and Smart's. Was having problems with the Suns length from the very beginning, and just did not seem to recognize ro adjust to the Suns 5 man defensive 3 second violation strategy. By various means, some inattentiveness, some being caught up in pick and pop situations, was just not staying in the vincinity of Frye to prevent all the long range jumpers you know you are going to get there. And Jason has been around. He has seen that wuss play before. There is just no excuse for not guarding him out there. Had one or two good hustle plays, including a great hustle tip finisih on the break to star the second quarter, but otherwise like most of the rest of the team got frustrated, got in foul trouble, kept ramming inside to get the ball knocked away, and with Fry having enough time to do his nails before shooting with JT constantly leaving him, Smart decide to go small, as in TINY, and jason was out of a job.
Elizabeth Hurley -- and somewhere back there in the early 90s Miss LeBrock handed her title of resident British hottie over to Miss Hurley, who if you have ever seen her in movies from when she was young, kind of came out of nowhere to be world class head turner.
So...we were spectacularly stupid this game, mysteriously so, as all bleeping night long we made ridiculously bad decisions on what to shoot and what not to shoot. If was like somebody had a magic 8 ball out there, and whatever it said to do our guy would do, no matter what the defense looked like, time on clock, or game situation.
Biggest blame ON the court goes to Tyreke, who has an amazing stat attached to him where we are 8-4 when he scores 20+ pts, and now 2-13 when he does not. As he goes, we go, and he just can't have games like this. Just can't.
However, I was also unamused by the shooting PG we drafted who could neither shoot nor handle the ball well enough to play PG against pressure defense, the saavy veteran leader we signed who made some of the dumbest plays of the night, nor especially the coach, who I thought basically ****ed up every single rotation of the entire night, never had the right guys together, overplayed guys who sucked, underplayed guys who didn't, and in general chipped into this loss as much as he helped the win on Thursday. We lost by 14, but never made a single real run in this one.
So I'm depressed. You depressed? Good. Girls.
As for flavor of girls? I had something else in mind, but I think I'll pluck a request, although maybe not quite in the same FFF cup spirit in which it was offered. At least not all of the time. So we're going to do British Babes, because really for such a scruffy little island they've done quite well over the years. I'm not an Anglophile per se, but I generally like the Brits. Tough stubborn people at their peak. Conquered the largest empire in history marching around in bright red coats begging to be shot at. And there weren't many of them either. England itself is only about a third the size of California. Even if you make it the whole UK with Scotland and Northern Ireland its still only a little over half. And they chopped down all their trees in the Industrial Revolution. Their idea of a forest we call a grove. (Nottingham forest is now literally about 500 acres). And they got real big into sheep back there, so most of the land was walled off and their aren't many wild animals left either. And their mountains...if you've ever been there you should go to their "peaks" district just for a laugh. I built sand volcanos that were bigger than that when I was a kid. Feel kind of bad for them, like maybe we should lend them a real mountain or something since we've got spares. Would anybody really notice if one of the Rockies went missing? Or maybe we could send them a volcano from the Cascades. Those things are trouble anyway. Anyway...scruffy little island, in fact many people even like to complain about the weather, although personally I prefer it to all the boring sun worshipping by all you warm weather wimp types. Unless of course you are a girl. And hot. And prone to wearing bikniis and lounging around in said sun, in which case you may still be a warm weather wimp, but you are my kind of warm weather wimp....Now where was I? Oh yes, scruffy little island. But they've done great things. And one of their great things has been producing a long line of hotties. And hotties speaking in cute little British accents too (although to a Brit the idea of a single "British" accent is comical, as they themselves draw so many lines between them they can tell which side of the street somebody is from just from how they talk. Not to mention of course that they invented the damn language, so its we who have the accents.). But anyway, time to get a move on, so again, welcome to Pretty Girls: British Babes Edition. Now onto the grades:
Boxscore
Salmons (D ) -- you know, I highlighted Reke's off game because he is often very very good, and when he flames out, that knocks out a big pillar of what you are trying to do. But there were a bunch of people struggling in this one, its just that we are so used to them sucking it feels like just a shrug. Exhibit A: Salmons, John. So John, who once gave us a 21-11-10 triple double in an earlier lifetime, sank back with a nifty 4-1-1 outing this time. Hit his first little pullup, and in fact had both of his hits in the early going. It was an upside game for him because from the start we looked uncomfrotable, and John himself was working hard on defense but having all kinds of problems against non-threats like Ghost of Hill and Diudley. Picked up three fouls in the first 9 minutes trying to stay with those thoroughbreds, neither of whom was averaging double figures coming into this game. As we often have seemed to do, came out of the halftime making it a priority to get Salmons, of all our guys, going. He bricked it and promptly disappeared. Not from the lineup though, as whatever pictures he has of Smart with those sheepmust be truly perverse. Maybe involving mutual shearing or something. Most annoygin thing about his, and half of our lineup's games was the sheer stupidity of their shot selction. The Phoenix Suns absolutely rubbed our noses in our lack of shooting, often collapsing all 5 guys down into the paint to form a little ball of ben gay and dentures, and time and time again fools like Salmosn would absolutely refuse to take the wide open jumpers they were thus presented on the perimeter, and instead put the ball on teh floor, dribble around like Travis Outlaw, and then force up some heavily contested crap into some geezers chest. I couldn't be a coach in the face of such dumbness. I would be calling guys over to the sideline and slapping them silly on national TV.
Kelly LeBrock -- now as she has aged there has grown to be rather too much of Ms. LeBrock, but back in her heyday the Weird Science/Lady In Red hottie was routinely listed on all the hottest women lists.
Thompson ( D+ ) -- minutes limited tonight by game dynamics and lack of brains, both his and Smart's. Was having problems with the Suns length from the very beginning, and just did not seem to recognize ro adjust to the Suns 5 man defensive 3 second violation strategy. By various means, some inattentiveness, some being caught up in pick and pop situations, was just not staying in the vincinity of Frye to prevent all the long range jumpers you know you are going to get there. And Jason has been around. He has seen that wuss play before. There is just no excuse for not guarding him out there. Had one or two good hustle plays, including a great hustle tip finisih on the break to star the second quarter, but otherwise like most of the rest of the team got frustrated, got in foul trouble, kept ramming inside to get the ball knocked away, and with Fry having enough time to do his nails before shooting with JT constantly leaving him, Smart decide to go small, as in TINY, and jason was out of a job.
Elizabeth Hurley -- and somewhere back there in the early 90s Miss LeBrock handed her title of resident British hottie over to Miss Hurley, who if you have ever seen her in movies from when she was young, kind of came out of nowhere to be world class head turner.
Last edited:
