Grades v. Nuggets 12/08

[Bricklayer]

You know you are a struggling team when you fly into Denver to face down the mighty Allen Iverson and Carmelo Anthony duo with...John Salmons and Beno Udrih.

Theme tonight/this morning will be a totally random one: Things They Did Not Have Before Discovering the New World

Artest ( B- ) -- maybe I should get into card reading -- at the end of the Clippers grades I thought we might have a chance against the Nuggets because Salmons likes the pace and would have a big game, and because Ron has owned Melo through the years, and...ahem. And that factor just adds to the confusion and difficulty in giving Ron a grade here. He did so many things good and bad, was up, down, all around, that figuring out what it all added up to is debateable at best. First the good: had a bunch of steals in the helter skelter game, quietly, but predictably if you know the history shut down Melo again (a power offensive SF going against the preeminent power defensive SF), and dished out no fewer than 11 assists, which is I believe the first time all season that a King has been in double figures in that stat (indeed there are nights when the whole damn team combined doesn't get double figure assists). Along the way to that total made a great full court underhanded bounce pass to Cisco on the break reminiscient of something that Webb did a few years back. Now for the bad: could get nothing to fall, and many of the shots were contested again with the Nuggets making some smart matchup decisions ot he frontline, guarding (and shutting down) Brad with Melo, switching an as spry as I've seen him in years Kenyon Martin over onto Ron to go bad attitude and defensive intensity to bad attitude and defensive intensity with him, and hiding Camby (who looked flat) over on Mikki so that he could come with the help defense. And perhaps more damaging than the missed shots late, were some costly and headscratching turnovers when Ron just shuffled his feet for no reason on his moves. Just looked the Nuggets, for maybe the first time of any team this season, had Ron's number and were in his head defensively. He never looked remotely comfortable, and the deicionmaking was suspect. In that way the big fireworks matchup of Ron and Melo really turned out to be a bit of a dud and a draw. Both guys got shut down and looked fugly while lesser lights determined the game. The tipper here to coming up with the "-" on this grade was that Ron again did not rebound on a night when we got killed once more. So good defense (on a major scorer), good passing (season high for us), steals (season high for him), to bad offense (season low for him, half his average), no rebounding (2), turnovers (costly late) ...and I decided to just call this a B- and move on.

Potato -- yep, one of the world's great staple crops (#4 after rice, wheat, and corn), had never been heard of in Europe/Asia before about 1570 or so. It was a native of Peru, and had not even spread to North America, let alone the rest of the world befor eht end of the 16th century. Yet within a few hundred years it was so much a staple and part of the culture of Ireland, Russia, etc. that a great potato famine could starve them out.

Moore ( B+ ) -- was the only King on the glass tonight, and with Camby sluggish and looking like maybe he had resumed his old ganja habit before the game, Miki really pretty much played him to a draw. Most of his offense came off of moving to the hoop when Camby went over to help against a driver, but he also finally hit a clutch face up jumper late in the game to hold us in it, although it led nowhere obviously. I was so so tempted to go A- here -- I mean Mikki freakin' Moore just grabbed 13 rebounds for us. Maybe i should have, not sure. It was close. But watching the game Mikki did not really dominate. He had some good moments, but it is not like you really noticed him dominating the glass, and in fact a number of those offensive rebounds came off of his own flubs. So...B+ it is. But if we had won, and that late jumper had played a major part, I think I would have gone A-.

Tomato -- and yep, another great staple that none of the great civilizations in Eurasia had ever encounted before Colombus made his voyage. Another native of the same region of South America that the potato is from (and the two plants are related actually) -- you know all the "traditional" Italian cooking? Pizza, spaghetti etc. etc.? That's all a few hundred years old at best. Julius Caesar had no idea what a tomato was.

Miller ( F ) -- started the game hitting a couple of open jumpers against the porous Nuggets defense, but then just completely fell apart. The Nuggets shwoed themselves to be one of theos ehandful of teams who have really thoguht about how to guard a three point shooting center wiht no post game, and had their SF (Melo) do it for most of the night. And Brad just couldn't do anythig with it. Ended up benching himself in the third, when he was even more embarrassed by getting Anthony Carter on him on a switch (Carter is a PG, albeit a stoout 6'3" one) in the post, going to post him up like you would think a big man should, and of course embarrassing himself by getting his shot blocked back in his face -- just another in a long string of such embarrasing episodes trying to post up guards over Brad's career. And of course predictably Brad then did the classic Brad frustrtation foul/thugging thing to pick up his 4th and head to the bench. And he never recovered. Came back in, and instantly picked up his 5th to start the 4th quarter, again on a chippy sort of play when a guy went for a steal. Barely returned, and it was #6. Along the way Brad chipped in a lovely 7pt 3reb effort, and I pretty much couldn't think of anything good he did to avoid this grade.

Corn/Maize -- of course this is a more notorious one given its association with the native indian cultures in the New World (indeed, there were completely dependent on it since many/most of the other major crops besides potatoes were limited to the Old World at the time). Nonetheless, along with potatoes, two of the four biggest staple crops in the world were unknown in Eurasia before some crazy italian dude decided to go sail over the edge of the world.

Salmons ( B+ ) -- this is an interesting grade, because basically as mentioned John made me look like a card reader by getting off to the huge huge start -- had 17pts in the first quarter alone just running up and down the court willy nilly and being largely ignored by the Nuggets. And then he spent the entire rest of the game trying far too hard to recapture that spurt, and hurting as much as helping in the process. Began to get selfish and treat sets like isolations for him . And with the Nuggets locked in, think he had nothing but 2-3 FTs in the second quarter. Turned it over, got a shot blocked. And meanwhile we scored 13pts in the quarter. Let's just say the iso for Salmons offense does not qork quite as well as the iso fro A.I. or iso for Kobe offenses out there. In the second half just kept on forcing, and we were lucky to have Beno step up as a second half hero, because John had nearly as many turnovers (7) as points (8) after the first quarter run was done. And so waht do you do wiht this one? An A+++ first quarter, and yet really not good at all afterwards as he got confused and tried to make it happen even after the Nuggets had locked in on him defensively. And yet still in the end a 25pt game on 9-14 shooting (yay!)...with 7 turnovers that were all on him (dribbling into crowds, going one on one, etc.) (boo). So, er...amazing as it would seem after that first quarter, I'm going B+ here and not feeling guilty about it at all. I was slapping my head constantly as he kept on forcing as the game went along.

Chocolate -- and this is of course the great mystery of history -- how the hell did civilization ever develop in the Old World without chocolate??? I mean, what was the point of life? No wonder they were always being complete *******s to each other and running around conquering and pillaging. I'd be perpetually grumpy too if you took away my chocolate. Of course if I had been born some ancient Roman or Egyptian or some such you can pretty much bet that my first order of business would have been to build a boat and send some of my peons out across the ocean to go fetch some of this stuff. No chocolate indeed! Harumph!

 

[Bricklayer]

Udrih ( A- ) -- did little in the first half but did have a nice alley oop pass to Mikki from out near the three point line in the corner. Nonetheless at halftime he might have had 4pts 3ast type of numbers as we were slowly fading back. But then a funny thing happened. Beno Udrih happened. Beno came out of the locker room with fire in his eyes, and said I've got your Allen Iverson and Carmelo Anthony right here baby! Beno's in the house! And so while Ron struggled, and John dumbled about trying to figure out how the hel he scored 17 points in a quarter, Beno Udrih went to work and poured in 20 second half points trying to lead us to an actual road win. The rgeat irony being of course that he was met and countered not by Iverson, not by Melo, but rather by his counterpart in "who?" backup PG obscurity -- Anthony Carter. Yes, we went form an anticipated Ron.Kevin vs. A.I./Melo showdown to a battle of Beno Udrih vs. Anthony Carter. Life is weird sometimes. IN any case, BEno was alive, and doing evertyhing he could to lead us to the W. It was not remotely all smooth though. Beno ended up taking 23 shots on the night, making less than half of them, and had no fewer than 5 drives blocked as he tried/forced again and again. In fact I had a bit of the same feeling with Beno after he got going as I did with Salmons -- he started having some success, got confused about how good he really was, and so was starting to really force and gun stuff. Was certainly the case down the stretch when he had a bad forced shot along the baseline (that was blocked) and a late turnover as well. And yet ironically on the final play where we still had a chance, Beno might have been too unselfish, passing up a pretty good look for a two close in to kick it for Cisco for the three (whcih he missed and may have ben fouled on). The two would have got us to OT, if he'd hit it of course. In any case, Beno was the guy who clearly led us back here on an odd night when various nobody players of ourse were dominant for a quarter or half, but nobody could string the whole game together.

Tobacco -- and well, sometimes you have to take the good with the bad. You get chocolate, but along with it you get a bunch of Europeans who see Indians sitting aorund with a burning weed stuck in their mouths and think this is a good custom to imitate. One does wonder how many millions...or would it be billions at this point? of people have died as a result of the discovery and cultivation of this New World weed by the European explorers.

Thomas ( D ) -- in and out of the lineup in the first half, and other than sporting a new headband, did nothing at all. Well....that's not strictly true. He did pick up 4 fouls. Ah verily is this the year when what we long suspected/dreaded has come true -- unable or willing to move Kenny or Reef in the past, the bottom has now fallen out and its proabbly next to imposible at this point.

Turkey -- and I thought an appropriate one for this performance and player. Yep, Turkeys are all ours, and so for once a tradition (Thanksgiving) that legitimately has something to do with the land it takes place in. Side note, the bird "turkey" takes it name from the country Turkey (land of the Turks), not the other way around. And why should it do so given that the birds are from North America, and Turkey is halfway around the world? A simple mistake by earlier explorers, confusing the North American turkey with a type of guinea common to Turkey (the nation).

Cisco ( B+ ) -- very active off the bench again -- the energy 6th man role has always been an obvious fit for him, and he played it to the hilt again. ALong the way it should not shock or surprise that were some shaky/stupid plays -- fouled a three point shooter, getting a steal and going full court, only to have it stolen back because he was not paying attention, forcing some simply dumbass shots, some of which went in, some of which did not. And yet it was Cisco, and his energy, which joined Beno in making a game of this one with a big second half. There is always the danger of him flying out of control and making a mistake because of that ratty old 386 processor he's got upstairs, but the effort alone often makes up for it, and especially in a game like this one -- like Salmons (and like Kevin if he had been here) a wild run n gun game is tailor made for skinny 6'7" guys. Was involved in the key controversial play in the final seconds, when the Nuggets did their absolute best to give the game to us by repeatedly passing it right to our guys in the final minute, and Cisco got the ball out on the wing for a three to go ahead in the final seconds. Turns out he was probably fouled by Iverson on the shot, but the call was not made (and indeed I initially did not think it was a foul before seeing the replay, so before we go too far into conspiracy here). And so another day, another Cisoc close call late - given that he is only 7th on the team in minutes, it sure does seem like Cisco has been involved in a lot of the key game ending plays for us this season, both good and bad.

Avocado -- while not up there with trhe potatoes or tomatoes or corn, or especially chocolate, the porr deprived civilizations of the Old World did not have access to this fruit/foor either. Eating must have deleriously boring back in the old days.

Douby ( D ) -- an unremarkable first half stint gets swamped here by a 2nd stint at the beginning of the 4th quarter that was disastrous for us. Turned it over, lost control of Iverson, and we had to call a timeout to get Beno back in it quickly to steady us and keep it close.

Horsies -- and I am blatantly going to cheat here and reverse the theme just because this is such an ironic thing. There were no horses in the Americas before the conquistador's brought them over (and I;ve always wondered about that -- a horse on a wooden boat for months at a time?? What a mess.). Anyway, for reasons unknown the horses native to America mysteriously died off about 10,000 years ago (although those unknown reasons may be similar to the reasons that all kinds of other big anmals died off about that time -- mammoths, giant sloths, etc.,and have somethign to do wiht the sudden introduction of a particularly pernicious two legged species prone to eating and wiping out most everything it encountered). In any case, there were no horses here. The "great horse culture" of the plains indians? That was created by the Europeans in only a few hundred years. The all American idea of a cowboy on horseback? Pure import. To be truly American he/she would be riding a bleeping llama. Little sidenote: another great Western staple, the tumbleweed? Native to Russia.

 

[Bricklayer]

Hawes ( D ) -- this is a hard thing to even grade because Spenser did so little in there there is nothing of which to grab hold. The game may have been too fast for him I guess. He again rushed/finessed a would be finish in close, and I keep on waiting for him to just slow it down and he has yet to do so. But other than that, we are talking 7 minutes of action and pretty much straight zeroes across the board (except for 2 fouls).

Reggie ( ) -- wisely went to our subs early in this one in an attempt to counter the effects of a running game, at altitude, on the seocnd night of a back to back. But still ended up playign the main guys big minutes and largely forgot about the reserves in the second half. Made good use of timeouts in the 3rd and 4th quarter to break up runs and try to settle us, and even kept one in reserve this time for the end of the game. Could tell he really really wanted this one afetr it became apparent the Nuggets were not interested in putting us away. The refs largely sucked, and Reghgie was bitching at them louder and louder as the game went along, and I'm actually mildly surprised he did not get a T -- in fact the closest he came might have been at what would have been a disastrous juncture with about 2 minutes to go.

 

[piksi]

it will be ugly and painfull. Tonight's theme should be most popular inquisition torture methods and with some creativity one can throw Horry's shot in there too, just because.

 

[acisking]

I've been wondering this for a while Brick, but why do you always leave the grades for the coach blank these days? I still remember you actually grading them back in the day.